The show must go on
by NihilisticAmbition313
Summary: When Carly dies, Freddie and Sam begin to rely on each other. They may even continue the webshow without the titular host, and they may even become more than just friends...
1. Prologue

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly. I do this only for entertainment purposes. I do not make a dime from this.**

...

**-Prologue-**

**Sam's view**

It just had to rain today of all days.

Freddie and I stood underneath his black umbrella and watched as they began to lower Carly's casket into the ground. From the corner of my eye I saw Spencer doing his best to maintain his composure, but it seemed like he was bound to lose it at any minute.

He and everyone else knew this day could have come, because Carly was diagnosed with leukemia last year. She fought the good fight, but the cancer won. But that didn't mean she didn't live every day she had left like it was her last, no sir. We still did iCarly, she still went to school when she felt well enough. Hell, she even talked to a guy for a while. She lived like she was sure she was gonna survive. That was Carly though. Nothing was ever gonna get her down, _nothing_. That's what I said in this poem I wrote for her. I left it tucked in her hand once Spencer said it would be okay.

I didn't really cry when Spencer called me from the hospital and told me Carly was gone. I was more numb than hurt. I didn't even really cry in the days leading up to Carly's service. I was in a daze, hearing all these people saying shit about Carly being dead, but not really associating those voices with reality.

But the situation became reality as I watched her casket lowered into the ground. That reality came crashing down on me like King fucking Kong. I felt my heart skip a beat as I gasped for air and lost my legs from underneath me. I began sobbing hysterically as Freddie scooped me up into his arms. He wrapped his arms around me, and I did the same.

Carly Shay was gone. Really gone, as in _forever_ gone. I felt my chest tighten as the tears flowed uncontrollably into a shoulder pad of Freddie's suit...

**Freddie's view**

My left shoulder was soaked with a mixture Sam's tears, snot, and saliva. I held her as tight as I could without restricting her breathing, while trying not to break down myself. It's not that I didn't want to degenerate into a puddle of tears, God knows I wanted to. But I wanted to be strong for Sam. Ha, imagine that; _me_ being strong for _Sam_.

Sam said something that I couldn't make out over hear sobs. It sounded like "I can't believe she's gone." I grabbed the nape of her neck and continued to hold Sam as she cried into my shoulder.

It was at that moment I realized that she and I were all we had left. I had no other close friends, and neither did Sam. Yeah, we had other kids we'd shoot the shit with and all, but the three of us were the "iCarly Clique". We were best friends, practically inseparable. Today was the final reminder that we'd lost one of our own forever...

I began to exchange my own tears with Sam...


	2. The two of us

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly. I do this only for entertainment purposes. I do not make a dime from this.**

**...**

**1-"The two of us"**

**Sam's view**

It was the Thursday after I had seen my best friend, my soul sister, lowered into the ground. I decided that I needed to go back to school that previous Monday, instead of my original plan of shutting up in my room and crying all day. That's not what Carly would have wanted. She would have wanted me to soldier on, and that's what I intended on doing.

I had to endure most of the week with people coming up to me with their condolences, and me having to thank them. It was painful to have to be reminded over and over again that my girl was gone, but I kept telling myself it would get better. It had to anyway...

The final bell rung, and I made my way to the locker that I used to share with Carly. Freddie was there waiting for me, like he had been for the past four days.

"Hey." he said

"Yo." I said back as disinterestedly as I could

"...Wanna grab a smoothie?" he offered again, for the fourth day in a row

"...Nah, I got shit to do." I replied again, for the fourth time this week

"What shit?" Freddie dared to ask in language that would get his mouth washed out with soap by his crazy mom

"_Shit_, alright?"

"Sam, why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Avoiding me. You won't talk to me, you won't answer your phone, you don't answer my texts or e-mails. Why are you dodging me?"

"Dude, I don't have time for this!" I barked past the lump forming in my throat

The truth, I _was _avoiding Freddie. In the two classes we had together I didn't even look his way, and I couldn't wait to get away from him. I know it sounds really cold, but being around him reminded me too much of Carly. I cursed myself for being so insensitive and selfish, at a time when Freddie was hurting just as much as me...

I tried to storm past him but he grabbed me by the shoulders, forcing me to look at him. I suddenly felt hot tears form in my eyes, and I had to squeeze them shut to stop the tears from falling.

"Leave me alone!" I half-yelled, trying to get out of his grip

**Freddie's view**

"Sam, don't...Don't avoid me."

"Let me go!" Sam protested and squirmed away from my grip

She tried to run away but I managed to grab her hand and pull her into a hug. She returned it and let tears fall from her eyes. Other kids were watching us, but they knew better than to say anything about what they saw. They knew why Sam was crying...

"Sam, listen to me. It's _us_ now." I said gently into her ear

It hurt my heart to say those words. "It's us now". As in, it's just me and Sam. No Carly in between us anymore. No Carly to stop us from fighting, to cheer us up whenever we're bummed, to scold us whenever we screw up. It was now just Sam and I, and I was determined to not lose my other best friend.

I let Sam cry it out and gave her a tissue from my backpack when she was done.

"...Thanks."

"Yeah...Sam, look. I know Carly was sorta the barrier between us, but that doesn't mean I don't consider you my friend. Like it or not, we need to stick together." I said with a grin on my face

Sam returned my grin and sniffled.

"Besides, it's not like we're all that popular. We're all we got really."

"Oh man...Stuck with Nubasaurus Rex." she chuckled as she wiped her face

"Heh. At least I'm a Nubasaurus who'll buy you a smoothie, if you want me to."

Puckett grabbed me by my lapel and wiped the rest of her snot on my shirt.

"Sam, I could've given you another tissue."

"I know, but your shirt's more absorbent...But you're right. Carly would be mad if we didn't hold it down together...I'm sorry for all cold shouldering you."

"It's cool...This isn't easy for either of us, so..."

"No...Hey, didn't you say you were gonna buy me a smoothie?"

"Yeah I did."

"Then why the hell are we still standing here? Let's go dork."

She called me dork, just like I was accustomed to. I was glad that Sam was at least trying to go back to business as usual. It gave me hope that both of us would be okay after all.

**Sam's view**

Frednub and I sat at our favorite table at the Groovy Smoothie after we got our orders from the counter. It was Strawberry Splat for me and Blueberry Blitz for him. We sat across from each other, and I tried my best to not pay attention to the empty third set where Carly would have been.

"...I was thinking I was gonna check on Spencer today." Freddie suddenly said

"Mmm-hmm." I hummed in between a long smoothie draw

"Come with?"

I sorta flinched at the question. I cared a lot about Spencer and all, but I wasn't really ready to set foot into Carly's place again.

"I don't know man. Maybe some other time."

"Okay...You wanna hang out at the crib?"

"_Crib_? Dude, stop trying to be cool."

"Oh come on, everybody says crib."

"Yeah, but everybody's not a perpetual geek like you."

"_Perpetual_? Sam, stop trying to be smart."

I took the straw out of my smoothie and flicked the end of it at Freddie, nailing him right in the face. He did the same to me, but I didn't get angry. It was actually pretty funny, and it made me wonder why I never took the chance on having a nicer relationship with Freddie.

Well, that was going to change. Life's too damn short, and I was gonna be a better person toward him...or at least try.

"Nice shot Frederina." I complimented as I wiped Blueberry Blitz off my nose

"Not so bad yourself Princess. You didn't answer me though."

"Hang out? Nah, I don't wanna be lectured about the evils of ham by your mother."

"She's not home. She's pulling a double at the hospital and I have whole the place to myself 'til seven."

"And why would you want me around when you could take that time to do a certain solo boy activity?" I teased

"Whatever Puckett. You wanna hang or not?"

"Eh...Long as I get to watch whatever _I _want on TV."

"Sure. What say we take these smoothies to go, before T-Bo offers us whatever he has on a stick today?"

"Let's jet."

I wasn't exactly thrilled about setting foot into Carly's apartment building for the first time since the last day I saw her alive. When Freddie and I entered the lobby I instinctively expected Lewbert to bark at us for being in "his lobby", but to my surprise he not only didn't bark, he gave Freddie and I a look that maybe said "I'm sorry".

As we rode the elevator to Freddie's floor, I was determined not to look at the door of the Shay apartment. To do so would have triggered my instinct to barge in, and if I did that it would've been all downhill from there.

Freddie and I exited the elevator, me keeping my eye to the floor. We made it to Freddie's door when an adult male voice called out to us from behind.

Spencer.

**Freddie's view**

"Freddie, Sam." Spencer called out to us as I was fumbling with my keys.

"Oh, hey Spence." I greeted

Considering he had lost the most important person in his life, Spencer looked to be in good shape, if only physically.

"Hey, I wanted to ask you guys something." Spencer continued

"What?"

"Well, I've been going through Carly's stuff, and I was wondering if you guys wanted to have some of it. I was just gonna put it away, but if you wanted some of it...y'know, to remember her by." Spencer said while shrugging

"Oh...Yeah, sure. I'd like that." I said

"You can go in and take what you want. I was on my way to the store. Just lock up when you leave if I'm not back." Spencer said as he opened the door to his apartment and abruptly took off down the hall

I walked over to the Shay apartment, but Sam didn't follow.

"Sam? You coming?"

"Uh...No, I don't really wanna."

"...Me neither. But it'd be easier if you came with me. Please?"

"...Fine."

Sam slowly came over and hesitantly looked into Carly's home. I looked at her and noticed a fresh wave of tears forming in her blue eyes...


	3. Take what you need

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer:I do not own iCarly. I do this only for entertainment purposes. I do not make a dime from this. **

**Thanks to my reviewers, your support mean a lot. Please keep reading.**

**...**

**#2-"Take what you need"**

**Freddie's view**

I patted Sam on the shoulder as her eyes filled with tears. We stood in the doorway of our fallen friend's home with the intention of raiding her stuff and claiming it for ourselves. I wasn't sure how I felt about going through Carly's things like a common thief, but I did want a thing or two to remember her by. If Spencer was just going to box it all I may as well.

Sam and I walked into the apartment that housed so many memories we shared with Carly. It was a surreal feeling, knowing that the beautiful brunette wasn't going to welcome us.

"So, um...You wanna go upstairs now?" I asked Sam, who was shaking like a leaf

"...I can't. I can't do this." Sam choked as she ran out of the apartment

"Sam..."

**Sam's view**

I bolted from Carly's apartment and curled up into a ball by the elevator. I knew I wouldn't be able to handle going back in there, but Fredward just had to insist that I did. He just had to have Carly's stuff, like it would bring her back or something. Yeah right. What's some stupid fucking stuffed animals and her PearPod matter now? I've never been all sentimental like that anyway. Material shit is just material shit at the end of the day. It's nothing you can take with you to the afterlife.

"Sam?"

Great. The nub has come to check on me.

"Leave me alone." I said barely above a whisper

Not only did he not leave me alone, he sat down beside me.

"...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked you to go in there with me. I just thought it would help maybe."

"Help? Help _what_?"

"Help us deal."

"Oh, so going and grabbing Carly's things is supposed to make me feel better or something?"

"Maybe."

"You know what? I don't need any fucking mementos. I got all the memories of Carly I need up here." I hissed as I pointed at the top of my head "You can go in there and take what _you_ need, but I don't want none of it. I'm outta here."

**Freddie's view**

Sam stood up and pushed the 'down' button on the elevator.

I decided that it would be best to let her go. She wasn't comfortable here and the last thing I wanted to do was try to force her to stick around for my sake.

"...Can I call you later on?" I asked

"You can, but nobody said I'd answer."

"Sam, that's cold."

"_Life's_ cold, nub."

I gave up. Sam was upset and she needed time to gather herself. I figured I would call her or at least text her later, just to let her know that I intended on standing by her.

The elevator came, and Sam stepped inside without another word toward me, and not even so much as a last glance. The doors closed, and she was gone.

I sighed and leaned against the wall. Looking up I noticed that the Shay apartment was still wide open. I walked over to the doorway and stood there for a short moment, then closed the door after making sure it was locked...

**Sam's view**

The sun had gone down finally, but my body was nowhere near tired. I lay sprawled out on my bed, gazing at the ceiling as if I could bore a hole through it with mental power or whatever.

I kept replaying what happened earlier between me and Freddie in my mind. I felt bad that I lashed out at him the way I did, when he was only trying to help. That _was _what we were supposed to be doing for each other after all. Even though I said I may not answer if he called, I decided I would. He deserved that much.

There was a soft knock on my door. Just my mother.

"Yeah?" I called out

"Hon? You okay?" Momma asked came in slowly

"Fine Momma."

Tragedy has a funny way of changing people. Before Carly got sick, Momma was a lazy, neglectful, drunken slouch of a mother who basically left me to my own devices. But when she found out Carly was sick, really sick, something within her clicked. I guess it was some sorta motherly thing. She started cutting back on drinking, and she started insisting on spending time with me. We started to talk everyday about what was going on with me, and with her. Momma even finally started cooking (cheap and easy stuff, but I wasn't nitpicky). I was skeptical at first, but I gradually began to accept that she really was trying to do better. It just really blows that it took my best friend fading away to spark the change, but, I like to look at it as one good thing that came from Carly's struggle.

"...You hungry? I didn't see you eat." Momma said as she came over and sat on my bed

When I thought about it, I realized that I hadn't eaten since lunch. Heh, you know Sam Puckett is out of sorts when she's skipping meals.

"We got any ham?"

"Yeah. You want some?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't Momma. Duh."

"Mind yourself young woman. I'll be right back."

My mother left to fetch my food. I sighed and rolled onto my side, just in time to see my cell phone light up on the nightstand. I could see the screen and who was calling.

It was Freddie.

"Hey." I answered after reaching for the phone

"Hey." he replied, sounding relieved that I picked up

"...Look man, I'm sorry I wigged out on you earlier."

"I don't wanna hear that Sam, I don't blame you at all. I'm just glad you picked up."

"...So, what did you take from Carly's? You didn't nab any of her underwear did you?"

"Like I would do something like that! Come on!"

"I'm just fuckin' with you dude, chillax. Seriously, what did you get?"

"Nothing. I didn't go back in."

"What? Why not?"

"Because of what you said. You're right that having Carly's stuff isn't gonna make me feel better. It's not gonna matter, so I figured what's the point?"

I felt a pang of guilt in my stomach for having said that. I may not have wanted any of Carly's stuff, but that didn't mean Freddie shouldn't have it if he really wanted it.

"Freddie, don't say that. If you really wanted something to remember her by you should've taken it. Forget what I think."

"...Yeah...Maybe I will take something."

"Do that...Ah hell, I may grab something myself after all."

"Are you up to going back in there, Carly's place?"

"Mmm...Yeah, I can do it. I'll be straight as long as you're with me."

"Tomorrow then?"

"Tomorrow, after you buy me a smoothie of course."

"Why don't you ever treat _me _to anything?" Nub King whined

"Because Momma thinks it's better to receive than to give."

"Ha ha...See you later Sam."

"Later."

"Oh wait, Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Um...My mother says that you-"

"Oh no, I don't wanna hear _anything_ your mother says."

"Sam, please. I'm being serious."

"Sorry. Go 'head."

"I was saying, my mother says you should never pass an opportunity to tell the people you care about how you feel, because you never know when it'll be too late. That's why I just wanted to say, um...I love you Sam."

"...Love you too, nub." I whispered with a cracked voice

"Good night."

"Night."

I turned my phone off and swallowed that lump that grows in my throat whenever I get all emotional. I hadn't noticed Momma standing in the doorway with a plate of ham.

"Here hon." she said as she came and gave me the plate

"Thanks Momma."

"Mmm-hmm." Momma mumbled as she turned to leave

"...Momma?"

"Yeah hon?"

"I love you."

My mother looked at me like I was fresh from Mars and I just told her I was here to take her back with me. I don't blame her though. We didn't do 'I-love-you' in the house of Puckett, but it's like Freddie said; You never know when it'll be too late. When the nub is right, he's right.

"Uh...I love you too Samantha."

Something else we didn't do in this house was displays of affection, so imagine my surprise when Momma gave me a hug over my plate of ham. It felt really awkward, but at the same time it felt good.


	4. Me, myself, and i

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: iCarly's not mine**

**...**

**#3-"Me, myself, and i"**

**Freddie's view**

"Hey Freddie." my best friend greeted as she let me into her apartment

"Hey Carly. Is Sam here yet?"

"Newp."

"Typical...Well she better _get_ here. We go live in an hour."

"I'll send her another text."

Carly whipped out her PearPhone and got busy on the keypad. It always amazed me how fast she could type on that itsy-bitsy keypad with her thumbs. She could probably bust out a novel on that thing.

"...I told her to get a move on already."

"Like that'll help."

"Don't sweat it Freddie. If she's late, I'll deny her ham for a week."

"You should've said _that_."

"I will next time."

I sat on the sofa in the Shays' living room. Carly was coming to join me when there was a knock at the door.

"Who could that be?" she wondered aloud

It couldn't have been Sam because she doesn't knock. Instead she just barges in, queen of rudeness that she is.

Carly went to answer the door, and a sudden feeling in the pit of my stomach made me jump up and grab her hand.

"No, don't answer that!"

"Freddie, let go! I have to answer that!"

"No!"

I had a feeling that whoever was on the other side of that door meant Carly harm. I couldn't let her answer it. But suddenly I felt my grip on her hand magically loosen. Free from my grip, Carly continued to the door. I tried to go after her but my feet were glued in place.

"Carly, don't answer that! Please!" I begged as I desperately reached for her

Carly opened the door, and my heart sank when a tall, grim-looking man in a white suit appeared against a foggy backdrop, a fog that wasn't there when I came.

"Hello. May I help you?"

No, Carly! Get away from him! Run!

"Carly, it is time. Come my child." the grim man ordered

"Oh, okay...I gotta go now Freddie." she announced in her ever-perky tone

"What? But you _can't _go!"

"But I _have_ to go. It's time."

"No, please don't go! Please, stay!"

"I'm sorry...You'll see me again, don't worry. You can meet up with me there okay? I'll be waiting for you. Take care of Sam and Spencer for me."

"Carly!"

"Later."

Carly walked out and disappeared into the fog with the man. My feet became unglued, allowing me to run to the door.

"Carly, please!" I shouted as I shot up from my pillow, gasping for air and wiping tears from my eyes

I glanced over at my alarm clock and it read 3:37, nowhere near time for it to go off...

"Shit...God I hope I didn't wake Mom up." I said to myself

That dream was too real. She was alive again, and life was back to normal. Then she just left, like she was going to the mall or something.

I shouldn't really be surprised that she went with no fear though. Throughout her whole fight with cancer, Carly was as brave as brave could be. Throughout the chemo, losing her hair, and the days she was too sick to get out of bed, she was a fighter. When she began to lose her hair, Carly insisted that Spencer shave her bald, because she wanted to lose her hair on _her_ terms. If I were faced with the same struggle Carly endured, I don't think I could be so brave, especially in the face of death.

It took a few minutes for me to compose myself. There was no way I was going to try to go back to sleep. I wouldn't have been able to. Instead I decided to tool around on my laptop until it was time to start getting ready for school.

I hadn't checked the iCarly message board since Monday, mostly because it was the same thing from our viewers. The apologies about Carly's death, questions about the future of the show, and some loser ass bastard trolls basically saying 'good riddance' (those were the ones that got swiftly banned from our forums) had become kind of tiresome, as rude as that sounds. I felt a little guilty about not being on the boards for three days though, so I logged in. I didn't want our fans to think Sam and I had abandoned them.

My private message box was expectantly jam packed (743 messages to be exact), and there was just no way I was going to even entertain the idea of wading through them all, at least not at that moment.

I went to the section of the site that housed the general question threads, and the most recent thread that was replied to asked "Will iCarly go on without her?".

Scratching my chin, I pondered this for a short while. I mean, the name of the show is "iCarly", but the namesake hostess is gone. How could we do "iCarly" without Carly? But then again, Sam had her own following as well. But would people tune in to see just her?

I decided to reply to that thread.

_"Dear people of Earth, this is Freddie checking back in with you (obviously). To answer your question of will we continue, the answer is...I don't know. I haven't talked to Sam about the show since...you-know-what. I will talk to her later on today and see how she feels about continuing and let you know. Until then everybody, stay classy."_

I wondered what answer I would be returning to our fans with._  
_

**Sam's view**

'Thank God it's Friday'. Indeed.

Final bell of school rang, and Frederette owes me a smoothie (well, doesn't _owe_, just that I insist he get me one). I met the boy at his locker as he finished putting away his books.

"Yo."

"Hey Sam."

"Ready to fly? Momma wants her smoothie now."

"Yeah...Sam, there was something I wanted to talk to you about."

"You can talk after you buy me fruit-and-milk-based nourishment."

"Okay, okay. Let's go then."

The walk to the Groovy Smoothie was pretty quiet. Freddie asked what I had planned for the weekend, and I told him not much besides ham and television, because it wasn't like I had someone to go to the mall with. Freddie said he'd go to the mall with me, but I explained to him that girls and boys don't usually go to the mall together unless they're hooked up. He said he knew but was just offering some company. I appreciated that and I thanked him anyway.

The Groovy Smoothie was in sight. I could already taste the fruity goodness on my tongue...

**Freddie's view**

Sam and I took our smoothies to our table. Today we switched our orders; Strawberry Splat for me and Blueberry Blitz for her.

"So, what did you wanna talk about Fredqueen?" Sam asked as she started in on her beverage

"...You think the show should go on?" I asked her flat-out

Sam paused in between a sip and looked down at the table. She sat her smoothie on it and looked me in the eye.

"You mean iCarly?"

"No, the _other_ web show we did. Yeah iCarly."

"...How? In case you didn't hear, there _is_ no Carly." Sam said just below a shout

I didn't want to upset Sam, but I wanted her to hear me out. I found it best to change the way I proposed my question to her.

"Let me put that another way. Do you want to do the show solo?"

"Solo? Nah, nobody would watch that."

"Why not? You have fans too."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do."

"Not as many as Carly."

"But they're there."

"Okay, maybe I do have fans. Even still, I don't think it would work. Me and Carls were a team and we bounced off each other. I was her ham and she was my eggs, y'know?"

Why was I not surprised that Sam used food to compare she and Carly's dynamic?

"I really don't think people would wanna see just me acting silly for a half-hour."

"There was more to iCarly than you and her acting silly."

"I know that."

"Listen, we could retool the show and make it work as a solo act."

"Build it around _me_?"

"Yeah."

I was really in pitch-mode now, like I was a Hollywood agent trying to convince my starlet to take the role of a lifetime.

"...I don't know, Freddie. I'm not really star material."

"Sure you are. You're funny, you're...funny."

"I'm not _that_ bad looking, dorkface."

"Sorry. Listen though, I told the fans I'd talk to you about it and report back. Do I tell them it's no go or what?"

"Just tell 'em I'm thinking about it." Sam said before another sip of her smoothie

"Fair enough..."

"But even if we _did_ do it again, it couldn't be called iCarly. It would have to be something else."

"Agreed...How about 'iFreddie featuring Sam'." I teased, knowing full well she'd smack that title down

"How about I kick your ass if you bill yourself ahead of me again?"

"Nah, too long winded."

"I liked it...'The Sam show'?"

"Lame."

"I know...But it's not like I said I was gonna do it anyway. I have to think about it."

"Right...So you still wanna go to Carly's?"

"That's the plan my man."

"Don't freak out on me again."

"No worries dude. I won't."


	5. A maybe is better than a no

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly**

**...**

**#4-"A maybe is better than a no"**

**Sam's view**

Me and Freddikins stood in front of the door to Carly's apartment after he knocked. We saw Spencer's car outside so we knew he was home.

This time, I wasn't anxious. I was ready to go in and face the music, so to speak.

"...Maybe he's asleep." Freddie said after Spencer didn't answer

"Wouldn't put it past him."

It was my turn to knock, and unlike Fredwuss I put more force into it. A few seconds passed and we still didn't get an answer.

"I guess we could try again later."

"Yeah, I guess. What you got in the fridge?" I asked with the intention of hanging out for a while

"Nothing you'd want. We could run down and get you some ham."

"Okay."

No sooner than when we turned to leave, we heard the door open.

"Hey guys." Spencer greeted

"Hey man. What took you so long to answer?" Freddie asked

"Was on the phone with business. What's up?"

"Oh. Actually, we didn't take anything yesterday and we wanted to today, if it was okay."

"Why didn't you grab anything yesterday?"

"Long story." I said

"Oookay. Sure, come on in. I gotta warn you though, most of it is already boxed up."

"Spencer, just what did you plan on doing with Carly's stuff anyway?" I asked

"Haven't gotten around to that yet. I'll probably give most of it to charity. Her clothes and some of her other stuff could do less fortunate kids some good."

That was Spencer for you. Even after the worst thing to have ever happened to him, he was still thinking of other people.

"Carly would really like that." I told him

"She would...Well, you guys can go on up. I gotta go see Socko about something. Same thing as yesterday, lock up when you leave."

"Right...Spence?"

"Yeah?"

"How you holdin' up dude?" I dared to ask

He looked at me with a glint of hurt in his eyes and replied "Trying not to break into a million pieces kiddo."

With that, he left...

**Freddie's view**

For as much pain as Sam and I were in, I couldn't even begin to imagine how much Spencer was hurting.

Carly was Spencer's everything. She meant more to him than any little sister had business to mean to a big brother. I'll never forget when I first met Carly after she'd moved in with him. He would watch me like a hawk spying his prey whenever I was in their apartment. He may have been a goof and came off as laid back, but Spencer was just as protective of Carly as my mother was of me (okay, maybe not as extreme as my mother, but just as protective). Spencer also spoiled her rotten. There wasn't _anything _that guy wouldn't do for Carly, including being the butt of some gags on iCarly. I would even sometimes get jealous that Spence wasn't _my_ cool big brother.

I fully expected Spencer to fall apart at the seams when Carly passed away, but from what I've seen he's doing his absolute best to keep it together. I have to hand it to him for being so strong, but I'm still concerned about the man...

"Let's go Sam."

"Wait. I need ham before I can do this."

"No you don't. Stop stalling."

"Fine. Let's go."

Sam and I marched up the stairs that led to Carly's room, a place that I'd rarely ever had the privilege of visiting (Spencer was strict about boys not being in her room, even if it was me). I opened the door and found that it had been pretty much boxed up and stripped down. Nothing but her furniture and some stickers on the pink walls remained visible. Everything else was in cardboard boxes that sat in the center and corner of the room.

"Man, Carly had a lot of stuff." Sam uttered

"I'll say. Where do we even start?"

"Just open up and box and go for it. It's not rocket science."

I followed Sam's lead and opened up a small box that sat atop a big box. It contained Carly's jewelry, placed in a plastic baggie. It was full of all the jewelry I'd ever seen Carly wear. Some of it was new, and some of it was from as far back as when we first met. I took out a purple-beaded bracelet that I liked on her and held it in the palm of my hand.

"That would look good on you." Sam goaded

"Shut up. What's that you got?"

"Don't you recognize a dreamcatcher when you see one?"

Sam held up a beautiful dreamcatcher. It was silver with three white feathers hanging from the bottom of it, and a sky blue ornament in the center.

"That's pretty."

"Yeah. I never believed in all that magic stuff like Carly did, but I always thought it was beautiful."

"Sure wish I had a dreamcatcher last night." I mumbled

"Why?"

"...Nevermind."

"If you say so."

Blondie dug through the box she got the dreamcatcher from, but wasn't interested in the rest of its contents. After going through all the boxes, neither one of us found anything else we wanted to take, though we did have a few laughs at some of the rather childish toys Carly owned that Sam swore she still played with.

"...You good?"

"Yeah. I'll just take this." I said as I put the bracelet in my pants pocket

"...Probably the last time we're ever gonna be in this room. Take a good long look Fredster."

"Heh...You wanna go up to the studio?"

"Sure, why not?"

**Sam's view**

Me and Fredlumps walked into the iCarly studio on the next floor.

Everything was still in place. The iCarly sign, the decorations, the light fixtures, our beanbag chairs. The studio remained virtually untouched since our last webcast four weeks ago, before Carly went to the hospital for the last time. Even Tech Boy's equipment was still in place, I guess on the chance we start broadcasting again.

To tell you the truth, I wasn't sure how I felt about moving on with the show. I had a lot of mixed feelings about going on without Carly. Part of me felt like I wasn't capable of carrying a webshow by myself, but part of me liked the idea of being the star of the show for a change, and because of that I felt guilty. Then there was the part that shuddered at the thought of being the center of attention. I wasn't a shy gal, but the idea of being in front of the camera all by my lonesome made me sorta uncomfortable.

"Home again, home again." I said as I looked around the studio

"Yup..."

This place, where we entertained thousands of people every Friday night, was like a second home. This was the place I could cut loose and have a good time with my friends every Friday. This was the one place I didn't worry about being _the_ Sam Puckett, notorious bad ass and crusher of nubs. I could act as silly as I wanted to and do all that crazy shit we used to do...It was an escape I guess.

"Sam? Penny for your thoughts?"

"...Nothing."

"You can't think about nothing."

"Just thinking about the good old days."

"That makes two of us."

"...You really think it could work?"

"What?"

"The show. With just us."

"I know it could...I feel like we'd be honoring her, and our fans."

"...You think Spencer would let us use the studio?"

"Is that a yes?"

"It's a question."

"Of course he would, that's a dumb question. Now is that a yes?"

"It's a maybe. That's all."

"But-"

"Dude, just take a maybe instead of a no."

"Okay."

I wasn't going to be too quick to decide either way. First, I was going to take a gander at the iCarly boards to gauge how much people actually wanted me, err, _us_ back. I'd do it later on the hand-me-down laptop Freddie gave me when he upgraded, since I didn't have a computer at home. He said we, as in the iCarly gang, should all have computers so we can keep in touch with our fans, and I agreed (shit, would _you_ pass up a free laptop?). It's a nice comp', older but not a dinosaur. It gets the job done.

"Let's get outta here. My stomach is angry with me."

"What else is new? Ham run?"

"No, I'm past ham-hungry now. Let's go to that new Burger Zone down the street."

"Your treat?"

"Yeah right."

"Thought not."

With Carly's dreamcatcher in hand, I walked out of the old studio with Freddie. I wondered, though, if it wouldn't be the last time.


	6. Lied, in bed

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: What's the point?**

**A/N: Thank you to reviewers Heather-TOG, TrueStarz124 , Randomqueen95 , Jenna-mckenzieloveseddie , aaamber, Midnight-Bluexx , KarlaRockAngel , gameandtvaddict123 , Lanter, and xxdevilishxx. Thank you to everyone who's favorited and alerted this story as well. Much love.  
**

**#5-"Lied, in bed"**

**Sam's view**

It's Friday night, and if this was last year, me and Freddie would be at Carly's. We'd either be doing iCarly, or hanging out afterward. Tonight though, I found myself on Freddie's couch watching Girly Cow. Luckily his mom was working yet another shift at the hospital (gotta commend that woman for her stamina).

"I just don't get this show." he said, sitting next to me

"That's because it's _cool_, and you don't get anything cool...I need some ham"

"We just came back from Burger Zone."

"Your point?"

"You just ate."

"Again, point?"

"Sam, you're gonna get fat one day."

"Who cares? Not like I'm on anybody's list."

"You don't know that."

"Yeah I do...I'm not exactly homecoming queen."

"Wouldn't argue with you there, but you're no slouch."

"...You mean that?"

"Yeah. Y'know you're sorta...Um..."

"What? Spit it out."

"Cute. You're cute alright?"

I've been called many things in my time, most of it unflattering. I have never, ever been called 'cute'. To be honest, it kinda tickled me.

"You think I'm cute?" I softly asked

"In a blonde-headed demonish sort of way, yeah."

"Ha..."

Oh, God. Don't blush, Puckett. Don't blush...

"Are you blushing?"

"No!"

"Yes you are."

"Shut up dork! I don't blush!"

"Come on Princess, lighten up. What's wrong with being my little cutie pie?"

"I am not your cutie pie!"

"My cute little Princess Pucky-Wucky."

"Shut up! I'm going home!"

"Wait, don't go. I'll chill."

"Nope! I'm out!"

I tried to stand up, but was denied by Freddie when he pulled me back down to the couch by my arm.

"I'm sorry, really."

"You've _always_ been sorry...You got me all fucked up now. Go get me some ham."

"No way."

"_Yes_ way. I'm discombobulated and I need my junk."

"Discom-_what_?"

"Discombobulated. When you fuck over my nerves and take me off my square." I explained

"Aww, I'm sorry for taking you off your square cutie baby."

I took one of the couch pillows and walloped Freddork over the head with it.

"Nobody calls me baby!"

"Ow! Okay, I'm sorry! For real!" Freddie laughed

"You better be nub! Don't let our talk last night make you forget who Momma is!"

"Okay, I won't...Damn that hurt." Nubasaurus whined as he rubbed his head

"Good. Now go get me some ham."

"Only if you come with me."

"Dude, do you not see me watching TV?"

"Do you see me not budging unless you come with me? There's no way I'm leaving you in my house by yourself."

"Please. Like I wanna steal any of your lame ass shit."

"I didn't say you would take any of my _cool _ass shit. I just know you would put the chain lock on the door and refuse to let me in."

"I would not."

"Oh really?"

"Yes really...But if you really don't trust me then I'll go with you." I said in a pouty voice, looking down at my Converse

"Sam-"

"No, it's okay. You're right. I might do something so mean. Heaven knows I have before. It's okay."

"Your martyr-fu is weak Sam-hopper."

"Sam-hopper? Dude that was lame." I chuckled

"In any case, let's go."

Freddie grabbed me gently by the hand and made me stand up with him.

"Okay you big baby. You're just scared you might get jacked by a hobo."

"I'm not as weak as you think Princess."

"Mmm, yes you are."

"Whatever. Let's go."

**Marissa's view**

"...We can't keep doing this." I said as I lay my head on my lover's chest

We'd just made love once more, against my better judgment and my common sense. I felt so dirty, laying in the hotel bed with him, after lying to my son about having to work. I've never lied to Fredward before about anything, and I lied to him. I felt so damn disgusted with myself.

"Yes we can." my lover said as he played with my brunette hair

"No...What if Freddie finds out? I _lied_ to him, I've _been _ lying to him. He thinks I'm at work right now, just like yesterday..."

"He won't find out. Marissa, we already talked about this a million times, and it's fine. We're both grownups here...Hey, you don't tell, I don't tell." my lover whispered as he caressed my ear, making my spine tingle

"...Okay Spencer." I whispered

Yes, Spencer and I have been sleeping together in secret. I know that it sounds ridiculous. I'm just about old enough to be his mother, and he's like a big brother to Freddie. It's wrong, wrong, wrong on so many levels.

It all began when Carly became ill. Spencer was so distraught, the poor man. I only offered him my support at first, offering myself as someone to talk to. As time wore on and Carly got worse, however, Spencer began relying on me more. One night while we were alone simply talking, he kissed me out of the clear blue sky. My first instinct was to slap the taste out of his mouth, but it was trumped by my second instinct, and that was to return the kiss. When our lips touched, I'd felt things that I hadn't felt in several years. I felt passion and lust, and I had no idea how much I missed that until Spencer made his move. Our make-out session led to my bedroom, and I really don't need to explain the rest.

Part of me is so, so ashamed that I'm doing this. Freddie would be so angry if he found out that not only was his mother a cougar, but a cougar preying on the man who was like his brother. But at the same time, it felt so good to finally have _my_ needs met for once. All of Freddie's life I've put him first and neglected my own desires, and I relished finally feeling like a _woman_ once again, even if I had to do so in secret.

"Freddie thinks I'm supposed to be home soon." I said into Spencer's bare chest as I played with his left pectoral

"Right...Time for one more go 'round?"

"Yes." I moaned as my lover flipped me over onto my back

**Freddie's view**

Sam and I survived our excursion to find ham and were back on the couch. Sam gnawed on her pork treat, completely absorbed by Girly Cow. She'd taken her shoes off and curled up on the couch, looking sort of sleepy (small wonder, seeing how she'd just eaten two cheeseburgers, fries, and almost a whole pack of ham)

I hated to have to tell her my mother would be home shortly. She'd have to go, because girls in the house after hours was a big no-no, even if it was Sam.

Sam let out a considerably loud yawn and laid her head on the arm of the couch, her curly golden locks almost falling to the floor.

"Sleepy?"

"Yeah. I don't feel like going back to the crib. I'm staying here tonight." Sam brazenly announced

"Sorry, no can do. Mom has this no-girls-after-hours policy, and you be a girl."

"Come on, man. I'm too sleepy to walk all the way to the bus stop, then catch the bus, then walk all the way home."

"You should've thought of that before you ate a fraction of Seattle's food supply."

"Please? I can hide out in your room and be gone before your mother is any wiser."

"I don't know Sam..."

"Freddie, be a friend. Don't make me go."

This was a really big request Sam was making, but my compassionate side was winning over my common sense. I didn't want Sam out there all by herself half-asleep and half-aware. There were some not-so-nice people out on the Seattle streets at night after all.

"...Okay, you can crash in my room. But you can't make your presence known."

"I won't."

"And you have to go before my mother wakes up."

"I know, I know...Thanks man."

"Sure..."

Just as Sam yawned again, the house phone rang. I went over to see who was calling at this hour; It was the hospital my mother works at. It must have been her to tell me she'd be home soon.

"Hey Mom." I answered

"Um, not really Freddie." a voice that did not belong to Mom replied

It was my mom's friend from work Janine.

"Oh, ha ha. Hi Janine. I thought you were my mother."

"No, and speak of that girl, is she home?"

"Oh, she hasn't gotten home yet."

"From where?"

"...Uh, from _work_?"

"...Well unless she's moonlighting at another hospital, I don't see how she's not back from work yet."

"What do you mean?"

"Your mom hasn't been here honey. She had tonight off."

"What? That's impossible, she told me she was working tonight."

"Well, that isn't the case kiddo. She was never on schedule for tonight."

"Oh...I'll tell her you called."

I hung up on Janine without waiting for her response and wandered back to the couch.

"What's going on?" Sam asked

"...My mom lied to me. She said she had to work tonight, but she was never at the hospital."

"Oh...Why would she do that?"

"How the hell should _I_ know?" I said in a testy tone

In all my life, my mother never lied to me. Why would she lie about having to work, and if she wasn't at work, where the hell was she? There was only one way to find out...


	7. The imperfect perfectionist

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Like Schneider's reading this shit**

**A/N: Well if I would have known how disgusted you'd all be by Sparissa (Spencer + Marissa) I would never have put it in, lol. Seriously, I know it's unorthodox but it plays into the story on the whole, so please bear with it. I promise there won't be too much more Sparissa sex ;)**

**...**

**#6-"The imperfect perfectionist"**

**Freddie's view**

I fished my PearPhone from my pants pocket and dialed my mother's cell phone. There had to be an explanation why she lied to me about going to work, and she was going to give it to me.

What could she possibly be doing that she didn't want me to know about?

"...Dammit, pick up Mom."

**Marissa's view**

Whomever was calling me wasn't going to give up. I pushed Spencer off of me just enough to grab my phone from the nightstand.

"Would you kindly tell whatever fucker that is to call back later?" he grunted in annoyance

"This fucker is my son, mind you."

I shushed Spencer and calmed myself down...

"Hello sweetheart." I answered

"Mom, where are you?" my son asked in an impatient tone

"Um...I'm on my way home sweetie."

"Really?"

"Yes, really." I said as I looked into Spencer's eyes

"...Mom, we really need to talk when you get here."

"We do? Oh, is something the matter honey?"

"Yes, something is the matter."

"Oh, no. I'll be right there, Freddie-Bear. Hold tight."

"Yeah."

I put the phone back on the nightstand and rolled Spencer off of my body.

"Something wrong with Freddie?" Spencer asked

"He says he needs to talk. He sounded pretty upset."

"Oh...So I guess we're done here."

"For now." I assured my lover and kissed his soft, supple lips

"I'll hang out here for a while. Don't wanna come in right behind you, you know?"

"Yes...Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow."

**Sam's view**

I knew Freddie's mother to be a neurotic, overprotective, overbearing control freak, but I never knew her to be a liar. Why in the world would she lie to him about having to work, unless she was doing something she had no business doing? My mother used to be a louse, but at least she was always upfront with me.

Freddie was angry. I mean, _really_ angry. I'd never seen Freddie really mad before. I've seen him annoyed and I've seen him frustrated, but I've never seen him _angry_. Seeing that side of him made me sorta uncomfortable.

"Freddie, relax. I'm sure your mom has a good reason for what she did." I said in an attempt to calm the guy down

"...She never lied to me before Sam. _Never_. Why would she start now?"

'I don't know. Dude, I'm sure it's nothing major. Maybe she just needed some time to herself or something." I said after scooting over and patting Freddie on the back

"She could have said so. When my mom says she has to work, I expect her to be _at work_."

"Freddie, don't trip. Just give her a chance to explain herself."

"I will, alright?"

"Okay..."

I reached down and put my shoes back on. I didn't really feel like I should be around when Freddie confronts his mom.

"I'm gonna get outta here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I shouldn't be here when you talk to your mom."

"If you say so. You gonna be okay getting home?"

"I dare somebody to fuck with me."

"Okay."

"Call me later and gimme a report okay?"

"I will."

"See ya."

**Freddie's view**

Sam softly punched me in the arm and walked out the door. She seemed to have become awake enough to make it home alright. I sat down on the couch and heaved a long sigh. How was I going to go about this? How _do_ you go about accusing your own mom of lying to you? I've never had that to worry about, ever.

About twenty-five minutes after I called her, Mom came through the door in her hospital scrubs, as though she had been at work. I stood up at met her at the door.

"Baby, what's the matter?" she asked without even saying hello

"...How was work, Mom?" I asked in a not-so-friendly tone

"Uh, work? Work was good. I'm a little exhausted though. Those patients sure know how to keep a woman busy, ha ha. But what did you want to talk about sweetie?"

"Janine called earlier looking for you."

"...Really? Ha ha, why would she call _here_? She knew I was right there with her at the hospital."

"Apparently you weren't."

"...Huh?"

Mom was starting to look nervous, but I had no intention of slowing down.

"Apparently, you were never on the schedule tonight."

"Ahm...Well, um, I..."

"Why did you lie to me Mom?" I finally asked

You know the term 'deer in headlights'? That was Mom.

"Mom? Why did you lie about working tonight? And if you weren't _there_, where were you?"

"...I, um..."

"Answer me, and no more lies." I said in the most hostile tone I'd ever taken with my mother

"Okay. Yes, honey I did lie to you about having to work. I know I've never lied to you before but-"

"Then why now?"

"Because...You wouldn't like the truth."

"What truth?"

"...There's a man."

"A man? As in, a _man_?"

"Yes...We've, um, been seeing each other for a few months now."

"Really? Mom, why would you think I wouldn't like you finally having a boyfriend? I think that's great. What's his name? When are you going to bring him around for my personal inspection?" I teased

"Um..."

"What, are you ashamed of him?"

"No, but...Freddie, you may want to sit down."

Mom guided me over to the couch and sat with me. Why the hell would I need to sit down for this?

"Honey...Please, _please_ promise me you won't overreact when I tell you who I've been seeing."

"Uh, okay. I won't overreact."

"...It's Spencer."

"Spencer?" I yelped "As in Carly's brother Spencer?"

"Honey you promised you wouldn't overreact!"

"I know, but that was before you told me you were seeing _Spencer_! Mom, what the hell?"

"Fredward, watch your mouth!"

"How long?"

"...A few months."

"_Months_? I suppose you two are doing it then?"

"Oh, well I don't think that's any of your business young man!"

"Are you!"

"...Yes." my mother, who was now red as a beet, confessed

"Oh, that's just great. I hope to God you used protection Mom. The last thing we need is a little Spencer running around."

"Stop talking silly Fredward! Of course we used protection!"

"Every time?"

"...I think."

"You _think_? You, the queen of safety and cautiousness, can't remember if you used a condom! God, how many times have you two done it?"

"Fredward please..."

Mom was on the verge of crying, so I made myself calm down. I wasn't done with her though.

"...Mom, don't cry. I'm sorry okay? But can you blame me for being a little shocked?"

"No." she sheepishly replied and dabbed away a tear from the corner of her eye

"How long were you gonna keep this a secret?"

"I don't know..."

"Mom, you always taught me it was wrong to lie, and wrong to keep secrets. How could you?"

"I'm sorry...I didn't want _anyone_ to know about us, not just you. I just sunk so deep into the lies and the sneaking and I couldn't stop it..."

Mom broke down and began sobbing. I took her in my arms and held her back.

"It's okay Mom. Please don't cry. I hate it when you cry."

"I'm so sorry Fredward. You must think I'm such a filthy hypocrite."

"No I don't. Please don't cry Mom. I'm not mad at you, promise."

I held Mom away and took a tissue off the coffee table to clean her face with. It was weird, me wiping away my mother's tears for a change.

"...You okay?"

"Yes. Thank you sweetheart..."

"...You do realize me and Spencer are gonna have to have a little talk, right?"

"I know...Please don't kill him." Mom laughed through her remnant sobs

"I haven't decided that yet." I joked back

"Oh my...Well, I'm going to take a shower and go to bed now."

"Okay. Good night."

"Goodnight sweetheart."

My mother gave me a kiss on the cheek and left for the bathroom.

**A/N: Sorry if Freddie's reactionary questions seemed a little weak. For some reason this site is zapping questionmark-exclamation point punctuations. But you get how he was supposed to be reacting I hope.**


	8. Waiting for Flo

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Nobody from Nick knows this exists**

**...**

**#7-"Waiting for Flo"**

**Sam's view**

I'd taken my shower and changed into a pair of green boxers and a white wife beater. I sat Indian folded on my bed with Girly Cow on the television and a plate of ham in front of me. I wasn't sleepy anymore because I'd caught a second wind when I left Bushwell Plaza.

I wondered how Freddie handled his mom. I was tempted to call, but he said he would call. I was getting a little impatient though.

Girly Cow had gone off and my plate was empty. I decided I needed a refill before the next episode came on, so I padded barefoot down to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and loaded back up. On the way back up I heard my phone ringing. I quickly went back into my room, closed the door, and dove for the phone knowing already who it was.

"What up dawg?"

"Hey." Freddie replied

"So...How'd it go with your mom?" I asked, sitting Indian style once again

"About as awkward as humanly possible."

"Don't follow. What did she have to say about her lying?"

"She admitted it, and she admitted why."

"..._Well_?"

"Don't laugh Sam."

"I won't if it's not funny."

"Promise me you won't laugh."

"Okay, okay. I won't laugh. Geez, what's her big flippin' secret? She's a pole dancer?"

"Of course not."

"Then _what_?"

"...She's been seeing a guy in secret."

"Yeah, if I was a guy I'd be ashamed to let the world know I was dating your mom too." I teased

"That's not funny Sam."

"Get over it lumpy. Who's the sap?" I asked as I put another slice of ham in my mouth

"...The one and only Spencer Shay."

A ham projectile launched out of my mouth and clear across the room!

"_Spencer_? Carly's older-"

"Yes, Carly's older brother." Freddie sighed

"Wow! That is _beyond_ twisted dude! Spencer and your mom! Ha ha ha ha! Don't tell me he's bangin' her!"

"Eeeyup."

"Oh my God! I knew Spencer was weird, but now I can add crazy to the list! Ha ha ha!"

"It's not _that_ funny Sam."

"The hell it ain't! That's the craziest shit I've heard this year!"

"You and me both."

"Ha ha ha! Here's hoping Spencer wrapped it up! The world doesn't need any Spencer Juniors runnin' around in stinky diapers!"

Freddie groaned as my laughing fit continued.

The last, and I mean the _last_ two people on this planet I would have _ever_ expected to hook up was Spencer and Miss Benson. I would have expected Spencer and _my_ momma to hook up first, and that's sayin' something.

I must've woken my momma in the room next door with my howling, because she peeked in and politely told me to put a cork in it. I apologized to her and turned my attention back to my phone call.

"...I'm sorry dude, ha ha ha...Boy you must've been _pissed_ when she told you."

"More like shocked, but I wasn't happy."

"How long they been hookin' up?"

"Months she says."

"Months?"

"Yeah."

"...Do you know what that means?"

"What?"

"They were boinkin' while Carly was alive.  
"...You're _right_. That never dawned on me."

"I don't believe it! Carly's sick as a dog and all that jerk can think about is screwin' your mom!"

"I don't think it was like that Sam."

"Well it is to me!"

"It's not like Spencer neglected her to be with my mom Sam. Just chill. It was what it was."

"...You're right. I'm just talking out my ass. Question is, how do _you_ feel about it? Spencer might become yo' daddy, boy."

"Like hell he would. No way."

"Never know."

"Whatever...So have you been thinking about the show?" Freddie asked out of the blue

"No, I haven't. I've been thinking about this ham in front of me. Don't pester me about it nub. That won't make me make up my mind any faster."

"Okay, you're right. No pestering...Well, I'm gonna let you go now. Glad you made it in okay."

"Yeah, I got a second wind after I left so I was okay."

"Cool. Good night Puckett."

"What, no kissy-kissy 'I wuv you' tonight?"

"Nah. Don't wanna spoil the effect with overuse."

"Makes sense. Night Nub Boy."

I turned my phone off and sat in by my foot. I looked over and noticed the dreamcatcher I took from Carly's sitting on my bed. I would have needed to put a nail in the wall above my window to hang it up and I wasn't gonna risk disturbing my mother again. I put it on my nightstand with the intention of putting it up the next day.

**Marissa's view**

After I'd taken my shower and changed into my pajamas, I noticed the white plastic bag from the drug store still sitting on my nightstand. Freddie's concerns about Spencer and I using protection rang in my ears. The truth was, there were a few times where, in the throes of passion, we were careless. Though we were protected the majority of the time, there were maybe two or three instances where we missed. I know, it goes completely against my reputation of being overly cautious, but when you're hot and horny as all hell and everything is moving so fast, caution sometimes takes a vacation.

It has been almost a week since my friend was supposed to come, and still it hasn't. I kept putting off opening up the little blue box and using the tiny plastic stick inside of it, in the hopes that Aunt Flo would come. But as the next Saturday fast approached, I began to genuinely worry she may not.

I sat on my bed and brought my knees up to my chin.

How could I have been so reckless? That isn't me, it isn't me at all. I'm the one who takes every precaution in every aspect of my life, and here I do one of the most reckless things a person could do.

"Mom? Can I come in?" Freddie asked after knocking

"Oh, one second sweetheart."

Thinking on my feet I hid the drug store bag in my nightstand drawer and called for my son to come in. He did so, and sat beside me.

"Yes honey?"

"Um, I just wanted to make sure you knew I wasn't mad or anything. Also I wanted to tell you, I love you no matter what. You may get on my nerves sometimes, but you're the best mom a guy could ask for."

Freddie's sweet words made me tear up...

"Oh, Freddie." I said, choking up

My son put his arms around me and I hugged him back.

He'll love me no matter what, he says...But what if I have to tell him that he may be a big brother and that it's Spencer's baby?


	9. Ingest Regurgitate Do it all over

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Get at me Nick**

**...**

**#8-"Ingest. Regurgitate. Do it all over again."**

**Sam's view**

The smell of bacon frying woke me from my sleep. It was Saturday morning, and Momma had taken to making me breakfast on Saturdays (God bless her).

I hopped right out of bed and went downstairs to the kitchen, where I found quite a sight for sore eyes on the kitchen table; A plate with bacon stacked sky high, sausages, fried ham, scrambled eggs, toast, and a fresh pot of coffee.

"It's about time you got your butt up. Though I was gonna have to come swat you with the spatula."

"Damn, Momma. We havin' company?" I said looking at the excessive amount of food

"No. Every time I cook you're back eatin' something else five minutes later, so I figured I'd cook a little extra."

"Smart Momma."

"You can start fixin' yourself up now."

She didn't have to tell _me_ twice. I began piling bacon onto my empty plate.

"...What in the world had you laughin' like a hyena last night? You woke me plain outta my sleep."

"Sorry about that. I don't really think I should say what it was though. It's kinda sensitive."

"As in none of my damn business?"

"It's nothing bad. It's just sorta bizarre."

"But funny as all get out right?"

"I was just shocked more than amused. But I really don't think I should say. It's sorta not my business to spread."

"Mmm-hmm. Well if it ain't your place to say, it ain't your place to say."

I knew Momma had already put the issue out of her mind. That's one thing about Sarah Puckett; She doesn't like gossip, and if something's none of her beeswax then she won't pry.

Momma joined me at the table as I was happily gnawing away on bacon.

"What you got up for today?" she asked

"Nothin'. Was probably just gonna stay in and surf the 'net."

"Don't have anything planned with Freddie?"

"Nope."

"Mmm-hmm."

"What about you?"

"I got an appointment at the hair dresser later. Why don't you come on with me? Get somethin' done with that rat's nest you call hair." Momma teased

"But my pet rats would be homeless." I fake-whimpered

"They'll live."

"Nah, I don't do the beauty shop, you know that."

"If you did, Freddie would take more interest in you."

I nearly choked on the eggs I'd swallowed!

"Agh! Freddie?"

"Yeah, Freddie. What, you don't wanna look good for him?"

"God no! I'm not into him like that! We're just friends and that's all!"

"That's how the great couples start out you know."

"No, no, no, no, no! I will _never_ be interested in Freddie like that!"

Was she nuts? Me and Freddie? Seriously?

"Well why are you gettin' so riled up about it?"

"'Cause you're talkin' crazy."

"Maybe _you're _ the crazy one. Don't let one of the good guys get away Sam. You're gonna wake up one day and he'll be some other girl's man."

"Good. I hope he finds a good girl." I said as I stood up with my plate in hand

I was so chizzed-off that I took my breakfast upstairs to finish it.

Geez, I just started getting closer to Freddie and already Momma wants us to be boyfriend and girlfriend. Never gonna happen.

**Marissa's view**

Still nothing. Aunt Flo didn't drop in this morning either. To say that I was getting really concerned would be an understatement.

I lay in bed, glaring a hole into my nightstand. I knew there was only one way to put an end to all my speculation, but I was too terrified to actually take the test.

Which is foolish. If I'm pregnant I'm pregnant, and that isn't going to change no matter how long I wait to test myself.

Deciding to just get it over with, I removed the drug store bag from the nightstand drawer and took out the pregnancy test. I scurried to the bathroom before Freddie, who was sitting in the living room, noticed me. I closed and locked the door and took the test stick out of the box.

"...Okay, Marissa. It's now or never."

**Freddie's view**

Wow. Mom must've really had to pee. I've never seen her scurry to the bathroom like that.

I sat with my bowl of cereal watching Girly Cow (Sam got me hooked), wondering how I was going to spend my day. I pondered doing some maintenance on my desktop computer, and maybe finally getting around to making that photo album with pictures of the iCarly gang. I decided against both and instead planned on seeing if Sam wanted to do anything.

Finished with my breakfast, I got up to put my bowl in the sink. I realized I had to pee myself, but Mom was still in the bathroom. I figured she wasn't just peeing in there and went to sit back down. After about twenty more minutes, I was getting impatient. I went back to the bathroom door and knocked.

"Mom? You okay in there?"

"Oh...Yes, sweetheart. I'm okay." she said from the other side of the door

"I gotta go Mom, could you please hurry?"

"Yes, I'm coming honey."

**Marissa's view**

Plus sign...Damn it to hell plus sign...

My worst fear was confirmed; I'm pregnant.

I'm pregnant with Spencer's baby, with Freddie's little brother or sister. My God...What am I going to do? Could I carry a baby to term? Would it be harmful to me? Can I afford another child? How is Freddie going to react? How is Spencer going to react?

I was getting dizzy from all of these questions swirling around in my head.

After carefully hiding the test stick and box in the trash can and washing my hands, I exited the bathroom and bypassed my son, holding my forehead.

"Mom, you sure you okay? Do you have a headache?"

"No, sweetheart. I'm just a little dizzy. I just need to lie down."

"Dizzy? Mom, come here."

Freddie ran up in front of me and pulled my hand away from my forehead. He examined my face and was visibly not pleased with what he saw.

"Mom, you look _terrible_."

"I'm fine Freddie, really. I...Urk!"

"Whoa, don't do that here!" Freddie yelped as he rushed me to the toilet, where I unloaded that midnight snack I had

My son was courteous enough to hold my long brunette hair back for me as I let loose. He then poured a paper cup full of water for me when I was done vomiting.

"Okay, you're clearly not okay. We're going to the hospital." my son stated

"No, I don't need to go to the hospital." I protested

Of course not. I already knew what was going on with me.

"Mom, you-"

"Freddie, trust me. I don't need to go to the hospital...I already know what's wrong with me."

Well, perhaps not _wrong_ with me, but...

"What? Is it a bug?"

"No, it's not a bug."

"Then what?"

"...It's something pretty specific."

"What?"

I really wasn't ready to tell Fredward the truth, but in that moment I remembered his words from the night before. That gave me the courage to tell him the truth, that and the fact that he would find out anyway.

"Freddie, let's go sit."

My son and I walked over to the sofa and sat. I took his hands and rubbed them gently.

"...Freddie, this isn't easy for me to say...I hope that you don't get too upset."

"Why would I?"

"Because...This is something that not only affects me, but you too."

"Just say it Mom."

"...Honey...I'm pregnant." I said, looking Freddie right in the eye

"_Pregnant_?"

"Yes. Sweetie, you're going to be a big brother."

"...Obviously it's Spencer's right?"

"Yes..."

"Wow...But Mom, you're too old to have a baby."

"...True, I am at an age that's risky to both the baby and me, but I've seen women older than me carry pregnancies to term. Plus, I'm in perfect health."

"..."

"Are you upset Freddie-Bear?"

"No, I'm not upset..."

"You could have fooled me."

"...I'm okay Mom, really."

Freddie gave me a hug, but he did not seem very happy about the news, as I'd feared...

**Sam's view**

After breakfast I sat in my room, still in my night clothes. I'd fired up the ol' laptop and went online to check out the iCarly message boards. I wanted to see for myself just how much our adoring public wanted us back, so to speak.

I hadn't been able to bring myself to visit the site since the day before Carly's funeral. It was too painful to read everybody's condolences and them talking about how much they would miss her and what a wonderful person she was, as if they actually knew her in real life.

I appreciate how much our fans supported Carly, right up until the day we had to do that special broadcast to tell them that she'd passed. Freddie didn't want to do it, but I insisted. They deserved to hear it from us, in person.

My inbox was stuffed. It would take me all day to go through all the private messages I got, so that would be for another time. I instead went through several various threads, just reading. The message I was getting was that our fans were sad that Carly was gone, but they wanted me and Freddie to keep it going. They wanted us and wished we would continue. It was just like Freddie said.

I spent an hour lurking around the message boards, and I logged off having come closer to a decision...


	10. The fetus position

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I love you Nick, please don't sue**

**...**

**#9-"The fetus position"**

**Freddie's view**

I'm going to be a big brother...

That thought repeated in my mind over and over again.

I tried to be happy because I'd always wanted to be a big brother, but the way this baby came about just left a really sour taste in my mouth. I wasn't angry with Mom or Spencer for that matter, but I wasn't thrilled with them either. I wanted to call Sam and talk to her about it, but I'd already put enough of Mom's business on the street. Not that I was worried Sam would go blabbing to the world about it, but I didn't think it was good to tell her.

I sat at my desk with my elbows on the surface, chin cupped in my hands, staring at the wallpaper on my computer monitor. It was a painting of a unicorn hopping over a rainbow, surrounded by a bunch of glitter and stars and stuff. It was _not_ originally my wallpaper, nor would I have ever used it under normal circumstances. It was Carly's wallpaper, and I adopted it to remember her by.

That reminded me of the bracelet I took from her room. I still hadn't taken it out of my pants pocket.

I went over to the spot on the floor where I left my pants from yesterday and retrieved the bracelet. I rubbed the purple beads with my thumb and thought of my best friend...

Carly would have been an aunt. She would have been so excited about the baby, and I know full well she would have spoiled him or her rotten. If Carly were still here, that baby wouldn't have stood a chance.

I was so deep in thought that I almost didn't hear my mother knocking on the door.

"Come in."

Mom did come in and noticed the bracelet in my hand.

"What is that?" she asked

"Oh, it's just something that belonged to Carly. Spencer said me and Sam could take some of her stuff if we wanted to."

"I see..."

"Did you want something Mom?"

"Yes, I did."

Mom came over and wrapped me into a hug...

"I want you to be strong."

"I will."

"...I love you, and this baby doesn't change how much I love you one bit."

"I know."

"...I know you're not happy about this."

I pulled away from Mom, fishing inside my mind for something appropriate to say.

"...I'm not exactly jumping for joy, but I'm not mad."

"I understand. Believe me, I'm not exactly jumping for joy either. But it is what it is my son...I'm going to need you now more than ever Fredward."

"Come on, you know I'm here for you Mom, you _and_ the baby."

"I do."

"...What about Spencer?"

"I'm going to tell him."

"When?"

"When I get ready."

"He's the father. You have to tell-"

Mom put an index finger to my lips in order to shush me.

"I'll tell him soon enough."

"Alright, I get it."

"Good...What else you should get is your clothes on for the day young man."

"Look at _you_, pregnant lady." I shot back at Mom, who was still pajama-clad

Mom pinched my cheek and patted me on the head. She left for her bedroom and I went to my closet.

As I was sifting through my wardrobe I heard the ringtone to my PearPhone. I went and grabbed it from my desk. It was Sam calling...

"Hey Princess." I answered

"What up dawg?"

"Nothing."

"What'cha doin'?"

"Was just about to get dressed. You?"

"Well...That's kinda why I called. I was lurking the iCarly boards, and you're right. Our fans really do want me and you to come back."

"You actually doubted me?"

"Not that I doubted you, I just had to see for myself."

"I take it you've made up your mind then."

"...No. I haven't decided _yet_, but I'm a lot closer to 'yes' than 'no'. That's what I wanted to tell you."

"Why aren't you all the way at 'yes'?"

"Because I have no fucking idea how we would go about it. We'd have to talk about what it would be, _how_ it would be...Freddie, I don't wanna do 'iSam' or 'iCarly-minus-Carly'. I wanna do something original, something that's...I dunno, all mine. Y'know what I'm sayin'?

"Yeah, I do."

"We need to brainstorm A.S.A.P."

"Right."

"I'm gonna ask my momma to drop me off over there, alright?"

"Cool. See you soon."

**Sam's view**

I got my momma to drop me off at Bushwell Plaza since it was on the way to the salon . I entered the lobby and was met with the yelling from Lewbert that I was accustomed to, but I ignored him and proceeded to the elevator.

I knocked on Freddie's door, and was greeted by Miss Benson, who I thought was where ever Spencer was going.

"Oh, hello Sam."

"Hey Miss B."

"Freddie's been waiting for you. He's in his room."

"Okay."

Call me crazy, but there was something different about Miss Benson. She seemed less uptight and neurotic. Now that I think about it, she's been more mellow for the past few months. Yup, Spencer's magic wand definitely had an effect on Miss B. Here's hopin' they they keep at it, for Freddie's sake.

I went to Freddie's room, where the door was already open. He was at his desk doing something on is computer.

"Yo." I said from the doorway

"There you are. Come in."

After taking my shoes off at the door, I went and sat on Freddie's bed. He stopped whatever the hell he was doing and joined me.

"So, ready to talk show business?" he asked

"Must you always dork up everything? Show business?"

"_Anyway_, you came here so we could brainstorm. I already got a few ideas, what about you?"

I actually did come up with a few ideas since I talked to Freddie, one of which was the new name of the show. It was gonna blow Fredlumps away.


	11. The Samnation of a webshow

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Is for wimps**

**...  
**

**#10-"The Samnation of a webshow"**

**Sam's view**

"Alright, what you got for me Fredison?"

"I was thinking maybe we should make it sort of like a talk show."

"A talk show? You mean like the ones my momma watches? No thanks. I ain't havin' no overweight hermaphrodites who are in love with midget wrestlers on my show."

"Not _that_ kind of talk show, Sam...Though that's not a bad idea."

"Quit jokin'. What kind of talk show then?"

"I meant one where we have guests live in the studio. People from the area who may have a talent or may have done something noteworthy. A lot like how we showed people on video, only they would be in the studio, in the flesh."

"Hmm...Sounds..._good_. I actually like that Freddie."

"You do?"

"Yeah...Oh, and we can have local music acts too. It could be like a variety show."

"Well, iCarly _was_ a variety show."

"I know, but this one would be different. No more shit like random dancing and meatball fights and watching Spencer sleep."

"You'd really scrap random dancing?"

"I'm not doing that all by myself. Besides, I wanna move past all that. I want this new show to be an evolution, not just the same old shit we used to do."

"I'm surprised you know how to use the word 'evolution'...I don't know, Sam. We may alienate a lot of our fans if we go in a different direction."

"I'm not talking about forsaking our fans. I just wanna show 'em something different."

"Forsaking? Damn, you're on a roll today."

"I'm not dumb, Fredward. I _do_ have a vocabulary that goes beyond 'ham' and 'Fatcakes'."

Which is true. I'm what is known as a "closet nerd". I'm real smart, I just don't _act_ all nerdy like Fredgeek.

"Wasn't saying you were dumb...Okay, we got a concept. That's good. Now, about a name."

"I got it already."

"You got a name?"

"Oh yeah. You ready?"

"Yes Sam, say it already."

"Alright, peep game...I wanna call it...'SamNation'." I proudly announced with a wave of my hands in the air

"SamNation?"

"Yeah..."

I was hoping to goodness that Freddie didn't hate it, but even if he did we were gonna go with it because Momma would say so.

"Damn...That's awesome Sam."

"You like?"

"Like it? I _love_ it. It works."

"Then it's official? We're renaming the show SamNation?"

"Uh...No chance of 'SamNation featuring Freddie', huh?"

"Hell no."

"Didn't think so. It's still awesome though."

"Meh, I have my moments. Way more often than you though...Okay, we got a concept, a name...When do we get rollin' again?"

"Whenever you're ready. Everything's still set up in the studio. All we have to do is plan out our first broadcast and promote it."

"You know what I think? I think we should hold of on the first SamNation for a few weeks and promote it so we can get our fans used to the idea." I said "We can do, like, little short viral videos to hype it up and plug them on the site. Speaking of site, you'd have to make a new one for SamNation too. We shouldn't convert or abandon the iCarly site."

"Agreed. It should remain as sort of a memorial."

"Right...Hold on a sec. I gotta go pee."

I left Freddie's room for the bathroom, and when I got there I saw Miss Benson kneeling before the toilet puking her guts out!

"Miss B? You okay?"

"...Uck...Yes, I'm...I'm fine."

Hmm, I guess her stomach's finally had enough of that health crap she makes. Still, I should get Freddie.

**Freddie's view**

Sam returned from the bathroom with a worried look on her face.

"Dude, something's wrong with your mom. She's blowin' chunks in the toilet."

Without a word I hurried to the bathroom and found mom on her knees, spitting out the remainder of her vomit.

"Mom? You okay?"

"Yes sweetheart..."

Mom flushed the toilet, stood up, and filled up a paper cup with water from the sink. She cleaned out her mouth and threw the cup into the recycle bin. Sam stood just outside the door, looking slightly concerned.

"Kids, I'm fine...It's perfectly normal at this stage."

"Stage? Stage of what?" Sam asked

"Oh...Well, you would find out anyway Sam, so I may as well tell you now. Fredward is going to be a big brother."

"...Get out of town. You're knocked _up _Miss B?"

"Yes, I'm knocked up as you put it." Mom said, rubbing her stomach

"I'll be a monkey's auntie. Way to go Miss B, congrats."

"Thank you."

"How far are you?" Sam asked

"I don't know. I only found out this morning. I'll have to go to the doctor to see just where I am."

"Oh. Well, congratulations all the same."

"Thank you Sam."

Sam headed back to my room. I gave Mom a faint smile and followed Sam.

**Sam's view**

"...How does it feel?" I asked Freddie as I flopped down on his bed

"What?"

"How does it feel to be a big brother?"

"I'm not a big brother yet. The baby isn't here."

"Okay, we can split hairs if you want to. How does it feel _knowing_ you'll be a big brother?"

"...I don't know."

"You're not happy? Sad? Pissed as all hell?"

"All of it..."

"...Fred, you always told me and Carly you wanted to be a big brother. Why would you be pissed?"

"I don't know."

"How can you not know why you're mad?"

"Because I don't!"

"...Listen man, you're about to be a big brother, so you might as well get used to that idea."

"What if I don't want to? What if I don't want a baby sister or brother after all?"

"Don't matter. It's coming any damn way."

"...I feel like such a dick for feeling like that, but I can't help it."

"I understand. Nobody said you had to be bouncin' off the walls with joy about it."

"Oh, I'm not."

I leaned over and put my hand on Freddie's shoulder (why did I take to touching him so much lately?).

"Look at it this way, homes. With a new baby in the house, your mom won't be all up in _your_ grill anymore."

"Heh...That's one way of looking at it I guess."

"...Freddie, be happy about this. I want you to...Carly would want you to...Life is so short man, and here comes a new one. Be happy about it."

I felt my eyes tearing up, and Freddie noticed.

"You're not about to cry _again_ are you? You've cried more times this week than I ever saw you cry in all the years I've known you, which was zero."

"I know...Funny, ain't it?" I whispered as the tears spilled over

Freddie brought his thumb up to my cheeks and wiped away the tears that had escaped.

"...I just don't want you to be mad about something that's really a miracle. Be happy about it guy."

"I'll try, I really will."

I was handed a tissue by Freddie, who kept a supply on his desk.

"Thanks."

"No problem...I swear I'll never get used to seeing you cry."

"Ha ha...I'll never get used _to_ crying. Ever since Carls left us it's all I feel like I can do."

"Not you, but me..."

Fredward wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me close to him. I leaned my head on his shoulder and took his other hand into mine. He then did something I would have never expected.

He brushed my bangs away and kissed me on the forehead...


	12. Sobering news

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Schneider stole my Buffalo wings! Get him!**

**A/N: Don't ask me how this happened, but this chapter got deleted and replaced with the next chapter.  
**

**...**

**#11-"Sobering news"**

**Spencer's view**

"Damn, my head is killing me..."

I woke up on my couch, in my clothes from the night before. There was a fifth of vodka on the floor, which made the memories of the night before come flooding back. I was with Marissa again, at our secret spot (a cheap ass hotel just outside the city, but whatever works in favor of secrecy). She had to go because Freddie needed her, leaving me alone with nothing but time to kill. I decided to grab some booze on my way home to kill the silence that filled my apartment, the silence that set up residence in this place ever since my baby sister...I can't even say it. I'll never be able to say it.

I'm not a very religious guy, never have been. But sometimes I wonder, why does God do some of the things he does? Why make my sister suffer with cancer for a whole year? Why take her away from the people who love her? She never did anything to hurt anybody, why her? I don't hate God or anything, I just want to know, why Carly? God, she was one of your best ones down here. Why her? Why not someone who deserves it, like a killer or a rapist?

These are the questions I bombarded Marissa with ever since she reached out to me a long while ago, and she always patiently listened. I needed that then. I needed someone to talk to, and the woman I used to know as Miss Benson did that for me. Little did I know, I would start seeing her differently. I never really paid much attention to how Freddie's mom looked, but the more I looked, the more beautiful she became. Call me sick, call me crazy, but Marissa was reeling me in and she didn't even know it.

One night, while Carly was well enough to go to a party at Wendy's with Sam and Freddie, I again sat with Marissa to talk. That time was different however. That time, things went from just innocent talking to me throwing caution to the wind and planting a kiss on Marissa. I was in so much anguish, and I just wanted a release, a distraction, _something_. I couldn't help it. I fully expected Marissa to pull back and slap the shit out of me, but to my surprise she fully returned my kiss. That one makeout session led to me searching my pockets for the old sausage casing, and ever since that night she and I have carried on a secret affair.

I hated myself for having sex with Freddie's mom behind he and Carly's back, but I couldn't stop myself. Marissa may be old enough to be my mom, but the woman is a closet _freak_. She puts some women I've been with who are my age to shame...Sorry. You don't wanna hear all that.

Anyway, my head was killing me because I was drinking vodka straight, no chaser (not smart, don't do), and I was in need of a hangover cure. The way I saw it, there were two people I could ask. There was Sam's mother, but I didn't really know her like that to go spouting my business. Then there was Marissa, but I didn't really want her to know I got hammered and passed out in my clothes the night before.

"...Well, they say hair of the dog that bit ya."

I took the one-third-empty bottle of vodka, unscrewed the cap, and hoisted it for a chug. The mellow liquor began working its magic almost immediately and made me feel well enough to lay back down for a spell.

Carly wouldn't like me turning to alcohol like this, but there's really not much else I can think of to kill the pain. It's either drinking booze or fucking Marissa, that's it. That's what my life has come down to, folks. The last real reason I had for living is dead, and here I remain.

I took another swig of the clear stuff, wishing to go back to sleep and halfway wishing to die at the same time...

**Marissa's view**

I quickly made peace with the fact that I'm pregnant, and Freddie at least didn't lash out at me. Samantha seemed to approve. There was now only one other person who needed to know, and that was my baby's father.

I figured that it would be best to take the straightforward approach, telling him point blank, no beating around the bush...as soon as I gathered the courage. That was what I was trying to do as I paced along the living room floor.

"Mom, why are you pacing back and forth across the living room?" Freddie asked as he and Sam came from his room

"Who, me?" I replied, somewhat startled

"Yeah you, pregnant lady."

Did Freddie deem that a new nickname for me?

"Oh...I'm just thinking."

"What about?"

"Nothing sweetheart."

"You can't think about nothing Mom."

Oh my God, is this what I've been doing to my son his whole life?

"...I'm trying to summon the nerve to tell the father, okay?"

"Spencer?" Sam asked

"...I suppose Fredward told you about us."

"Yeah, but that's not important. Miss B, Spencer doesn't have anybody left, as far as relatives. This baby is gonna be all he's got, and he'd be excited to know it's coming. He's gonna love him or her as much as he loved Carly, so there's no reason to worry about telling him."

"Ha...I suppose you're right, Sam...I'm going to go over there right now and tell him."

"Now?"

"Yes, now. There's no point in procrastinating any longer."

**Spencer's view**

After another swig of the ol' Ruskie juice I was just about buzzed enough to go back to sleep and dream of a time life wasn't a piece of shit. I reclined on the couch and closed my eyes, only to be disturbed by a knock on the door.

I didn't really care who it was, but I wanted to at least dispatch them quickly. I went and opened the door without looking through the peephole, and there stood Marissa.

"Hello Spencer."

"Marissa? What are you doin' here?" I slurred, obviously buzzed

"Spencer, have you been drinking?"

"Me? Just a li'l bit, that's all. You wanted something?"

I must have looked like a freakin' hobo to Marissa.

"How much have you had to drink?"

"Just some vodka, no big deal."

Marissa looked past me and saw the half empty bottle of booze.

"_Some_? It looks like you just drank half of a fifth."

"No, no, no. I bought it last night, I swear. I only had a little today. I'm cool, really."

"...Can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure."

I stood aside and let Marissa in, still unsure of what exactly she wanted. She turned to face me and sighed.

"Spencer...I have something to tell you."

"What?"

"...You're the only man I've been with in years."

"Yeah, you told me."

"I say that because...What I'm trying to say is, Spencer...I'm pregnant."

"..."

I could have sworn I heard Marissa say she's pregnant.

"...Come again?"

"I'm pregnant. Spencer, you're going to be a father." Marissa said, faintly smiling and holding her tummy

As if God himself had reached down and washed his hand over my body, I went from drunk to stone cold sober in a heartbeat.

"You're pregnant?"

"Yes."

"...I'm gonna be a daddy?"

"Yes."

"..."

I'm pretty sure my eyes were as big as dinner plates as I approached Marissa and touched her tummy.

"I'm...I'm gonna be a daddy..."

Marissa almost jumped out of her skin as I shouted "Yes!" with a thunderous clap of my hands!

"I'm gonna be a daddy! Whooooooo!"

I was so loud that Freddie and Sam came running from his apartment. I didn't care how loud I was though. I didn't care if all of the Pacific coast heard me.

This is the best thing that could've happened to me after everything I've been through this past year.I'm going to be a dad. Do you hear that Carly? You're going to be an aunt.


	13. And then there were three

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Sparissa is here to stay, deal with it.**

**...**

**#12-"And then there were three"**

**Marissa's view**

I was afraid of how Spencer would react to the news of his impending fatherhood, but it turns out that my fears were unfounded. Not only was he not upset, he was excited. Much more excited than Freddie to say the least.

"So, how does it feel knowing you're gonna be a pop?" Sam asked Spencer

"It feels awesome, kiddo...After this year I needed something, y'know? Something to be _happy_ about."

"I know you did." I said as I caressed the face of my baby's father "You've been through so much..."

Spencer wrapped his arms around me, and I did the same for him.

"...You're gonna go through with it? The pregnancy?" Spencer asked as he pulled away

"Of course. What else would I do?"

"I dunno, I was just thinking. You're not exactly young and all."

"I'm aware of that, and I'm aware it'll be risky. But I intend on carrying this baby."

"...Freddie, you're not mad at me are you?"

"No, not really." my son answered deadpan

"I mean, I know it's weird that me and your mom were-"

"I said I'm not mad." Freddie interrupted with a clear harshness in his tone

Sam placed a hand on Freddie's shoulder.

"Maybe we should let them talk." she suggested to him

"Whatever."

The two kids left Spencer and I alone in his apartment...

**Sam's view**

Freddie was not happy about this baby. He was not happy at all. I could smell the unhappiness

coming off him like a cheap cologne.

"...You wanna go to the Groovy Smoothie?" I asked once we were outside of Spencer's apartment

"Whatever."

"'Whatever' isn't an answer. Yes or no?"

"Fine!"

"Don't get all pissy with me!"

"Sorry."

"C'mon, let's go. I'll treat you this time." I offered, hoping that would make him feel better

"Really?"

"Sure. I owe ya one."

"You mean one-_thousand_."

"Don't blow it Frederino. Be grateful."

The Groovy Smoothie was pretty empty for a Saturday afternoon. Me and Freddie went up to the counter, where T-Bo was putting some big ass meatballs on his trademark wooden stick.

"Sam, Freddie."

"Hey T-Bo. Meatballs on a stick eh?"

"Try one?" he ordered more than offered

"Uh, we're good. Just a Blueberry Blitz for me. Freddie?"

"Same."

"Two Blitzes coming right up...You sure you don't want to try-"

"Do we _ever_ try anything on a stick?"

"...No." T-Bo sheepishly answered, sounding kind of hurt

I sorta felt guilty, but not enough to try a meatball on a stick (what was it with that guy and food on a stick anyway?).

T-Bo gave us our smoothies and I paid him (as painful as it was). We took to our usual table and commenced to sipping. Well, _I_ commenced to sipping. Freddie commenced to swirling the straw in his smoothie around.

"You better drink that instead of playing with it, Fredface. Ain't no tellin' when I'll ever treat you again."

"Heh."

At least that got a grin out of him.

"Hey guys." a girl voice said from behind me

The voice belonged to Wendy, one of our friends outside of the iCarly gang.

"Hey Wendy."

"'Ey." Freddie mumbled as Wendy sat down with us

"You okay Freddie? You look sorta down." the redhead noticed

"I'm fine."

"Leave him alone. He's sorta got something big on his mind." I cautioned

"Oh...None of my beeswax?"

"For the moment."

"Fair enough...You know, your message boards are on fire. Everybody wants you to come back."

"Tell us something we _don't_ know. It's cool though, because we're coming back soon."

"You are, f'real?"

"Yup. Only, it's not gonna be 'iCarly' anymore. It's gonna be something new."

"Whoa! Deets!"

"Can't say kid. Alls I can say is that it's gonna be awesome."

"Aww. Not even a hint?"

"Nope. You have to wait like everybody else."

"Sa-aaam." Wendy whined

"If we told you, we'd have to kill you."

"Hmph...Well if you _don't_ tell me, I'll tell everybody you're coming back. Then _everybody_ will harass you."

"You wouldn't." I said in my most threatening tone, which I knew didn't faze her as she was one of the few people who weren't scared of me

"I so would...Unless you would bargain for my silence."

"What are you talking about?"

"Weeeellllll...I always wanted to be on iCarly. Maybe there's room for a sidekick on your new show?"

"You're saying you want in?"

"Yes ma'am. Let me be your co-host and I won't squeal about the show."

"Ah...I don't know. Freddie?"

"I don't give a shit." Freddie mumbled "The more the merrier. Why _not_ add a new member to our family?"

Did I mention Freddie wasn't happy about the baby?

"Um...Yeah, I guess you can be my sidekick. That'd be cool Wendy."

"Sweet!"

"But, you can't say anything about the show yet."

"My lips are sealed."

I was sorta looking forward to doing the whole solo act, but I was also relieved that I would have a sidekick of my very own to play off of. Wendy isn't my bff or anything, but she's good people and I like her.

"So, when are we going live?"

"We don't know yet. We're gonna build up some hype first."

"How?"

"We're gonna do some video promos over the next couple weeks, and Freddie here's gonna make the website."

"Sounds good. Just tell me what you need me to do."

"We will, just as soon as we know what _we're_ gonna do."

"Alrighty then. See you later, _co-stars_. Ha ha."

Wendy took her smoothie and half-skipped out of the shop.

Just like that, SamNation went from being my show to being a duo act., but I didn't mind. Not to toot my own horn, but iCarly wouldn't have been half as good as it was if Carly didn't have me to bounce off. Sidekicks truly are underrated you know.

"...Looks like we got ourselves a show."

"Hmph." Freddie huffed

"Freddie, would you stop acting like a dipthong?"

"I'll act however I wanna act Princess."

"We talked about this already man. You said you were gonna be chill."

"I _am_ chill."

"You're pissed."

"So what?"

"...I give up...You know, your mom's gonna have a baby in a few months, but from what I can see, she already has one right here. Later."

I took my smoothie and left without looking back...

**Freddie's view**

I wanted to call Sam back, but I just let her go. She was disappointed in me for acting the way I did, but frankly, so was I.

I stared into my blue-hued smoothie, but I wasn't at all interested in drinking it.

Sam was right to be mad at me. Even after we talked about it and I promised I'd try to be happy about the baby, I still managed to act like a spoiled little asshole.

Maybe that's all I am at the end of the day. Maybe it's all I've _ever_ been. All my life, I've had my mother to myself. There were no siblings, and no men. It was just me and Mom. But now it's going to be me, Mom, the baby, _and_ Spencer, whatever capacity he'll be in. I just wasn't big on that idea. Everything was about to change, and I didn't too much want change that big. I just didn't.

"Hey man, you alright?" T-Bo asked as he approached the table

"...Don't know."

"Anything a meatball on a stick can cure?"

The dreadlocked man put the stick lined with meatball in my face. I normally would have said no, but something inside me said 'fuck it'.

"Yeah, why the hell not. I'll take one."

T-Bo must have been shocked because his eyes went as wide as tires.

"Th-that'll be three bucks."

"Here."

I paid T-Bo and took a meatball off the stick. It was the size of a baseball, and it smelled of various herbs and spices. I took a bite, and to my surprise it was pretty good.

"Hey, this isn't bad." I said

"See? You never know what's good until you open your mind." T-Bo said and walked away

Right...


	14. Between girls and boys

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Jennette is far and away a better singer than Miranda by the way.**

**...**

**#13-"Between girls and boys"**

**Freddie's view**

I walked home by myself from the Groovy Smoothie, intent on calling Sam to apologize for being such a dick. I figured it would take her at least a half hour to get home, so I waited in my room for an hour and some change. Mom wasn't back from Spencer's, and I didn't dare venture to think of what they were doing in his apartment (not like she could get pregnant _again_, but still).

I grabbed my PearPhone and speed-dialed Sam's number.

"What up?" she answered, her television blaring in the background

"You made it home?"

"Yes sir."

"Oh...Sam, I'm sorry I was such a jerk earlier."

"Yeah...Well, I'm sorry I bailed on you."

"It's cool...So, what're you doing?"

"Shit. My momma is off gettin' her _huur _did, so I got the living room to myself for a change."

"Heh. I figure _my_ mom is getting _her_ hair done too, but not the hair on her head."

"Eww, visuals!"

"Ha ha ha!"

"Dude, don't make me think about that!"

"Hey, _I'm_ the one who's gonna be a big brother because of it."

"Doesn't mean _I _ have to have it lodged in my brain."

"Heh heh...How about Wendy though? She straight up blackmailed us."

"Yeah she did. Truth be told though, I'm glad she's on board. I wasn't sure if I could handle the spotlight on my own."

"You would've done fine."

"Doesn't matter now anyway...Oh, guess who called."

"Who?"

"Melanie. She's touching down next weekend."

"Cool."

Melanie is Sam's identical twin sister. She goes to a stuffy, exclusive boarding school in the midwest on scholarship because she's a legitimate genius. It's funny when I think about her, because there was a time when I refused to believe that she was real. I thought that Sam was trying to trick me by making up this Melanie persona and putting on a nice girl act. If only I'd not been such a doofus and believed in her, who knows where Melanie and I would be? She could've been my girlfriend by now if I hadn't been so mistrusting of Sam. Oh well...

"She says she's looking forward to seeing you."

"Ha. Is she now?"

"Yeah, God knows why. She's still crushin' on you for some sick reason."

"Well, once you go Fredward, you never go back. Heh heh."

"More like once you go nub you run screaming to the hills." Sam taunted

"Nah, more like once you go Puckett you go abstinent."

"Shut up nerdface."

I couldn't see it, but I could tell Sam was smiling on the other end.

I like making Sam smile. I like our teasing, our banter, our twisted friendship that only we understand. No, I don't like Sam like _that_, so don't get your hopes up. There are no unrequited romantic feelings. But I do love her like a sister, a sister who torments and demeans me on the daily basis, but a sister no less. I'm just sorry that it took losing the other girl I loved like a sister to make me realize how important Sam is to me.

"Nerdface? That all you got Princess?"

"Eh, I'm kinda off today."

"Have you had your ham?"

"Does a bear shit in the woods?"

"According to those toilet paper commercials they do."

"There you go then. I got my fix right here in front of me."

Someday I'm going to ask Sam why she's addicted to ham. There just has to be a reason.

"...Speaking of food, I tried one of those meatballs on a stick."

"Really? How was it?"

"It wasn't bad actually."

"Hmm. If that be the case, you may be spending more money on me at the Groovy, Mister Benson."

"Mister Benson?"

"What? That's your name ain't it?"

"Yeah, but when did I become a 'mister'?"

"Fine, _Miss_ Benson."

"Whatever _Miss_ Puckett."

"Dork...I gotta go. I just hit my daily limit of time I can talk to a nub without going ape shit."

"Oh, I didn't realize."

"Later."

"Later partner."

**Marissa's view**

Spencer and I were laying naked in his bed. Somewhere after Fredward leaving we found our way to his bedroom and did the exact same deed that made me pregnant (it's usually fine for pregnant women to have sex in case you were wondering). I lay my head on his chest (the best thing since my own goose down pillow) and sighed.

Now that Freddie was in the know, there was no more need to sneak. That in itself was a huge weight off my chest, and not having to worry about getting busted made our experience even more enjoyable. I know that I sound incredibly selfish, but I can't help that. Besides, I'm about to mother a baby all over again, and I intend on having a little fun before he or she comes.

Spencer blew into my ear, making my scalp tingle.

"Mmm..."

"...You sure it's cool for us to have sex now?"

"I'm a nurse. I know for sure it's safe." I moaned, not happy about having to talk

"...I just don't wanna do anything to hurt Lottie."

"Lottie? Who's Lottie?" I asked, lifting my head and looking Spencer in the eye

"Our daughter. We're naming her Carlotta, but her nickname's gonna be Lottie."

"But, we don't even know what the baby's going to be."

"It's a girl. I feel it in my bones." Spencer said with total confidence

I should have been put off by how he basically _told_ me what the baby's name would be with no regard for my input, but I also knew that he would not be denied. If this baby were indeed a girl, it would be named Carlotta in honor of his sister, end of discussion.

"...But what if it's a boy?"

"Charles." Spencer replied quickly "And we'll call him Charlie...You okay with that?"

"Yes...You want to honor Carly, and I won't stand in the way of that."

"Thanks." Spencer said and kissed me gently on my forehead

I caught a glimpse of Spencer's alarm clock from the corner of my eye and saw that I'd been with him for hours now (time flies when...you know).

"I better get back." I whispered, hoping Spencer would refuse to let me go

"No, stay." he whispered as he wrapped his arms around my naked torso, effectively granting my wish

"You make it so hard to stay." I teased

"Then let me convince you why you should stay." Spencer grunted in my ear and placed me on my back

"...I love you." I whispered as Spencer mounted my body

"I love you too..."

Never in a thousand years would I have pictured myself whispering those sweet, precious words to Spencer Shay, but I did.

I love him. Heaven help me, I love Spencer, the father of my baby.

The sweet, kindhearted man-child who lived across the hall from me was establishing himself as the love of my life, and I was absolutely helpless to stop it...

**A/N: I know, more Sparissa. "Blech, ewww, gross, do not want." But it ain't goin' nowhere, take it or leave it. Besides, Sparissa is the catalyst for Seddie in the coming chapters. Patience children.**


	15. Minutes to launch

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I will never beg for reviews**

**...**

**#14-"Minutes to launch"**

**Freddie's view**

It's been six days since I learned I would be a big brother. Friday had come without much to report, save for Sam and I planning out our SamNation introduction strategy. Wendy was in on it as well now that's she's part of the cast. We decided to do a series of short clips that would air in the old iCarly slot, 8:00 PM, and do that for four, maybe five weeks. Plus we'd launch a new channel devoted to SamNation on a particular viral video website and put the new promos up there as well. We agreed to shoot the first promo and air it tonight, and we made our iCarly audience aware through the message board. Needless to say, they're eager to see the little something we have planned.

The school day had come to an end, and I was putting my books away for the weekend when Wendy came up to my locker.

"Hi Freddie."

"Hey."

"Are you as excited as I am about the show tonight?"

"Well, it's not the real show just yet, but I am pretty stoked."

"I still can't believe I'm gonna be a full fledged member of iCarly."

"It's not iCarly, Wendy. It's SamNation." I patiently reminded our newest partner

"Oh, sorry."

Wendy is cool, but sometimes she can seem a little thick about the skull.

"Speaking of Sam, where is she?"

"Detention. She racked up another tardy and hit her limit."

"You're kidding."

"Unfortunately not. Only this time it wasn't her fault. She was on her way to the bus stop and some asshole splashed her with curb water as he was driving by. She had to go home, shower, and change all over again."

"Aww, that sucks."

"Yeah it sucks. It puts a clamp on our schedule."

"Well, she'll be out before we go live right?"

"Yeah, but that's one hour off of our prep time."

"Dang...What are _we_ gonna do 'til Sam gets out?"

"I don't know. I guess we can wait for her at the Groovy Smoothie."

"Good idea. I'll text her and let her know."

**Sam's view**

Just when I vowed to never be stuck in detention purgatory again.

Thanks to some dick who thought it would be funny to splash me with fresh Seattle rainwater with his tires, I was late to school and got flicked.

Everybody else must have been perfect little angels today, because I'm virtually alone in here, besides the warden, who was more interested in some novel than watching me. I could have just as easily snuck out and she wouldn't have noticed, probably even less cared.

I heard my phone let off the text message alert inside my bookbag, which didn't even get a look from the warden. I took it out to see a message from Wendy. Apparently her and Freddie were gonna be waiting for me at the Groovy.

I wonder if T-Bo is gonna have more meatballs on a stick.

I stared up at the ceiling and began counting the holes in the paneling. I did this for about three minutes when suddenly the lady teacher spoke "You ready to blow this pop stand?"

Eh? Did she just ask if I was ready to go _early_?

"Who, me?"

"No, the other girl here. You wanna bail or not? I got a date to get ready for tonight and I really don't feel like babysitting one kid. You walk, I didn't see it, we both get the hell outta here."

"Uh...Okay."

I grabbed my bookbag and got up from my desk. I took one last look at the teacher, Ms. Perry I think. I didn't have her, so I wasn't sure. She looked to be about Spencer's age. She had fiery red hair and she dressed pretty hip for a teacher.

"Thanks." I said

"For what?" she said with a wink

"Oh, right."

I wasn't about to argue with her. I knew playing dumb when I saw it, and I took it for what is was worth.

Whoever this teacher is, she's cool in my book.

I took out my phone and texted Freddie to let him know I got paroled...

**Freddie's view**

Wendy and I were talking about miscellaneous topics when I heard my phone go off, citing a new text...

"Hold on, I got a new message." I said "...It's Sam. She got out early and she's on her way."

"Sweet! She probably had Ms. Perry. She _always_ let's kids out early."

"And how would you know?" I asked in a teasing fashion

"Um, it's not that _I_ would know..." Wendy peeped as her cheeks turned a healthy shade of red

"Ha, don't sweat it. Even _I_ did detention before."

"_You_? What did _you_ do?"

"Well, I didn't really do anything but be in the wrong place at the wrong time. It's stupid."

"Tell me." Wendy ordered as she put her hand atop mine

"Ah..."

I looked at our hands, and Wendy quickly pulled her's away.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay."

"...You don't hafta talk about the detention thing." Wendy peeped, looking down at her smoothie

We sat in a painfully awkward silence for several more minutes until finally Sam came into the shop.

"What up amigos?" she greeted as she took a seat

"Hey. Lucky you, getting bailed early."

"Chiz yeah. I was about to fucking die of boredom...Where's _my_ smoothie?"

"Huh?"

"Dude, you knew I was coming. Why didn't you get Momma a smoothie?"

"Excuse the hell outta _me_, Princess. Would you like your royal smoothie now?"

"Yes, nub."

**Wendy's view**

There Sam goes again, being all mean and bossy to Freddie.I thought that maybe Carly's passing would bring them closer together, but I guess I was naive.

Freddie went over to the counter to get Sam's drink. She looked at me and half-grinned.

"Ready for prime-time?" she asked in a friendly tone

"..."

I just don't get it. Sam is always nice to me, yet she treats poor Freddie like dirt. Well, if that's how she's going to act, I'm going to let her know I won't tolerate it.

"Sam, I want you to be nicer to Freddie."

"...Uh."

"I mean it. There's no need to be so mean to him. It's not funny."

"Wendy-"

"Carly would be so disappointed."

**Sam's view**

'Carly would be so disappointed'

I should have slugged Wendy for mentioning Carly like that, but she was only concerned. She didn't really understand the dynamic of me and Freddie's relationship. Carly was the only other one who did.

"...I know." I mumbled

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." Wendy quickly apologized

"Nah, it's chill...I'll play nice. Wouldn't wanna get you all upset." I said half-sincerely, half-condescendingly

"...A desk." Freddie suddenly blurted

"Huh? "

"You need a desk. If SamNation is going to be a talk show, you need a desk."

"Uh, okay. That's all well and good, but I don't have any desks lying around."

"We can get one from the thrift store, and some chairs. Then we could have Spencer paint them up."

"Yeeeeaaahhh." I breathed "Good thinkin' dude. I could ask my momma if I can use her pickup to get it to the studio...But how are we gonna pay for all that?"

"I'll pay for it." Wendy chirped "You guys are letting me be on the show, it's the least I can do."

"Uh, you kinda forced your way onto the show." Freddie pointed out

"Why split hairs?" Wendy asked

"Anyway, we can go to the thrift store tomorrow if you guys want."

"I may not be able to get the truck tomorrow. Melanie's coming back tonight and my momma's probably gonna take her around." I said

"Oh...Well, we still have a few weeks before our premiere, no worries...You ladies ready to hit the studio?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Oooh, this is so exciting!" Wendy squealed

"Ha...Yeah..."

At least _one_ of us isn't nervous...


	16. The task at hand

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I just kicked Dennis Blunden's arse and stole iCarly...not really**

**A/N: Shorter chapter here, but I just wanted to feed you guys something before the pitchfork mob came looking.**

**...**

**#15-"The task at hand"**

**Freddie's view**

Sam, Wendy, and I stepped off the elevator that led to my floor. I heard some sort of power tool being used from behind Spencer's door, but that wasn't surprising. He commonly used power tools for his artwork.

"Wonder what masterpiece Picasso is makin' now." said Sam as we approached the door

"Just as long as it's not a giant pair of pants again."

"Ha ha."

"What?" Wendy peeped

"Oh, just something that happened a while ago. You wouldn't understand."

She beat on the door hard to get Spencer's attention, and after a few seconds the power tool stopped. The door swung open, and a sweat-covered Spencer opened the door.

"Hey gang." He greeted, taking off his safety goggles and wiping his brow

"What up?"

"Hey Spence."

"Hello."

Spencer let us in, and off at his workspace I saw what he was making. It was not a sculpture, but what looked like the beginnings of a baby's crib.

"Spence, is that what's gonna be a crib?" I asked, pointing at the woodwork

"Yes, sir. My baby's gotta sleep _somewhere_." Spencer proudly replied

"I didn't know you knew how to make a crib." said Sam

"Well, carpentry is an art form in itself kiddo. I took shop class in high school, so I know how to do a little somethin' with wood, y'know?"

"Yeah, that's how my mom got pregnant." I ribbed, earning sniggers from both Sam and Wendy

"Ha. I left myself open for that didn't I?"

"Yeah...But that's a pretty awesome crib so far. Lottie or Charlie's gonna love it."

"It's not even gonna know what it is, dipthong. It's a _baby_." Sam sneered

"I think the baby will love it too." Wendy piped up in my defense

"Yeah. I just hope your mom likes it, Freddie. Oh, and don't tell her I'm doing this. I want to surprise her."

"Tell her you're doing _what_?" I said with the wink of an eye

"You're really stoked about being a dad aren't you?" Sam asked

"Oh yeah...Well, at least _now_ I am...You know me, how I used to get around. But I never wanted any kids out of it, y'know? Hell, I never wanted _anything_ out of it but the thrill."

Spencer took a moment to ponder his next statement.

"...Last year, if a woman would have came up to me and told me she's knocked up, I would've ran for the hills. That, or basically imply she's a slut and there's no way it's mine and tell her to get lost...Lottie, or Charlie, is my miracle though. My miracle after...you know."

"Yeah..."

"...And that's why it's important that I get back to work! Baby needs bed!" Spencer said with that same goofy gusto that we've grown accustomed to

"Spencer, you've got plenty of time you know!" Sam chuckled

"I know, but I haven't even gotten started on the toy chest, or the cradle, or the changing table, or the..."

Spencer rattled off a laundry list of things that he was going to craft for his son or daughter. He was going to be busy for the next several months. I wondered if he'd even be able to set aside some time to paint up the SamNation desk and chairs.

"Spencer?"

"Or the rocking horse..."

"_Spencer_?"

"Or the bookshelf..."

"Spencer!"

"...What, man?"

"We were wondering if you'd be able to take on another job for us." I said

"Like what?"

"We need you to paint an old desk and some chairs for us. They're gonna be part of the SamNation set." Sam picked up

"Oh, cool...But I can't. Too busy with my baby's stuff, not to mention a few commissions I have to get around to."

"Aw, come on dude."

"I'm sorry kiddo. Baby needs his or her stuff, and Daddy needs the money to take care of Baby."

"Do she or he really need a _bookshelf_?"

"Hey man, I've heard of babies who learned how to read as early as two years old. Baby may even beat that. It may be a genius!"

It was no use. Once Spencer set his mind on a task, it was a done deal. Not even Carly could sway him. That was one thing I always admired about the man though. He stuck to whatever mission he laid out for himself and saw it through, win or lose.

"Damn..."

"Don't fret, young people. I know a few folks who can do the work."

"Who?" asked Sam

"I'm lookin' at 'em."

"_Us_?"

"Sure, why not? It is your show, isn't it? The stuff should look how _you_ want it to."

As if a lightbulb went off over my head, I looked at each of the girls wide eyed. Why didn't we think that we could paint our own set props? Why bother Spencer when we could paint it up how _we_ wanted to?

"You know what Spence, you're right. We _should _do it ourselves."

"Oh, boy. I get to get paint in my hair, or get into a paint fight with Count Nubula here." Sam complained

"I think that's a great idea! It'll be fun!" Wendy cheered

"I suppose you'll pay for the paint too then?" Sam asked Wendy in a not-so-friendly tone

"Sure. I'll even buy you a hair net."

"Wow, you're too kind."

**Sam's view**

I'll even buy you a hair net, she says.

We haven't done one show, and already Wendy's gotten on my damn nerves. First she barges her way onto SamNation, then she becomes Freddie's yes-girl, now she's patronizing me.

From afar, I always thought she was cool. Now that she's in close range, Wendy's really starting to rub me the wrong way.

**Wendy's view**

I'm sure I can find a net big enough to contain that mop Sam passes off for hair.

We haven't done one show, and already Sam has proven she's going to be the disagreeable one. First she hasn't stopped treating Freddie badly. That really irks me. Plus she balks at doing her own paint work for _her_ desk and chairs, which _I_ volunteered to pay for mind you.

Of course, Sam is notoriously lazy, but she could at least _try_ to show some enthusiasm.

I'm starting to question if this is going to work.


	17. Daddy's home

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Ham is good**

**A/N: Special thanks to Boris Yeltsin for the inspiration.**

**...**

**#16-"Daddy's home"**

**Freddie's view**

"Sam, come on."

"Sorry. I got it this time."

Sam and Wendy were on their third take for the very first SamNation promo. The idea for this one was to have Sam formally announce the new show and introduce Wendy, but she got choked up on the first two...

I counted the girls down, and on one Sam began speaking...

"Hey guys. Sam here, along with my new partner Wendy."

"Hi." Wendy greeted with a wave

"We know you've been wondering what was gonna become of us ever since Carly left us, and I'm here to tell you. As of today, iCarly no longer exists. But, Me, Freddie, and Wendy are gonna carry on. This is SamNation, and -"

"Hold on a second." I interrupted

My PearPhone rung the tone that signaled my mother calling. I answered, mildly agitated at her interruption.

"Yes Mom?" I sighed

"Fredward...Could you come home. please?" my mother asked in a shaky tone

"Mom, what's wrong?" I asked as I quickly stood up from my desk

"Just please come home."

Mom sounded near tears, making me realize something was truly wrong.

"Mom, is it about the baby? Are you in pain?"

"No, it's...Freddie, please just come home." Mom wept

"Okay, I'm on my way."

Sam looked at me with concern on her face.

"What's wrong?" she asked

"I don't know, but I gotta go. My mom sounded like she's about to have a breakdown."

"Oh my God."

What the heck has Mom so upset? ell, I'm about to find out.

**Marissa's view**

God, why? Why now? This is the last thing I need now that I'm pregnant. This is the last thing Freddie needs. God help us...

"Mom?"

I barely noticed Freddie come in because I was so busy wringing my hands and pacing. He came over to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"What's the matter Mom?"

"Oh...Freddie, it's terrible, and it couldn't have happened at a worse time."

"What?"

"...He's back."

"Who's back?"

"Your father. He's back in Seattle."

Poor Freddie looked like his entire body went numb, the same as mine when my ex-husband called and told me he was back in town.

"What?" Freddie barely croaked

"Yes. He called, and...he's coming." I wept

"..."

"He wants to see you."

"...Is he out of his damn mind? Why the hell does he want to see me _now_? He hasn't bothered for six years."

My ex-husband, Jacob, basically abandoned Freddie and I when Freddie was only ten-years-old. He and who I came to learn was his girlfriend-on-the-side moved to Olympia, and he never looked back. We divorced, and haven't had contact since then. He faithfully paid his child support, but he hasn't bothered to have anything to do with his son either.

"I don't want that piece of shit anywhere near me."

"I know you don't, and I told him that. But he says he wants to make it up to us-"

"I give a damn about settling that bastard's conscious?"

"Of course not, and you shouldn't. But, he is your father."

"...No, he gave up that right six years ago." Freddie said in an unnervingly-calm tone

There was a knock on the door.

"Please let it be him. I feel like breaking somebody's nose." Freddie grumbled as he approached the front door

**Sam's view**

Freddie opened the door to his apartment, looking like he was ready to murder somebody with his bare hands.

"Oh, it's just you." he mumbled

"Uh, yeah..I came to see what was wrong. Is everything okay?"

"No, it's not."

"What's wrong?"

"Heh...My bastard father is back in town and he wants to make nice with me."

"Whoa..."

I knew the whole story about Freddie's dad, and it was an extremely sensitive subject. As much as I love teasing Freddie, even I'm not cruel enough to tease him about that.

"You mean, he's back? As in, moved back to Seattle?"

"I don't know and I don't give a shit."

"Mmm..."

I looked past Freddie at Miss Benson. She had a pained, stressed-out looked on her face. I pushed past Freddie and approached her.

"You okay Miss B?"

"Yes, I'm fine dear..."

Miss Benson sure didn't look fine, and if she wasn't fine, the baby wasn't fine.

"Maybe you should sit down Miss B."

"Yes..."

I guided Miss B to the couch and sat her down.

"Mom?"

"I'm fine Freddie...Just a little dizzy."

Before I could even do anything, Miss B wretched and let loose whatever she had for dinner all over my lap!

"Shit!"

**Freddie's view**

Mom finished relieving her stomach of food and bile all over Sam's pants and shoes. Sam, needless to say, was mortified, but she didn't seem angry.

"Oh, man."

"I'm so sorry." Mom apologized as she tried to catch her breath

"No, it's okay Miss B...Ugh."

Sam stood up and assessed the damage. Mom got her pretty good; Sam's pants, shoes, and the lower half of her shirt were wasted.

"What am I gonna do?" Sam said under her breath

That was a good question.

"I'm so sorry Samantha."

"No, don't say that Miss B. I know it was an accident..."

My mind was racing trying to come up with a solution to Sam's problem. She certainly couldn't catch the bus home covered in vomit, but she didn't have any clean clothes on hand...

Wait a minute. I wonder if Spencer donated Carly's clothes to charity yet...

"Hey Sam, maybe Spencer still has Carly's clothes. You two were about the same size right?"

"Yeah we were. Could you go see?" Sam asked

"Yeah."

**Sam's view**

Freddie left to see if Spencer had some of Carly's old clothes to change into. I would need to take a shower too.

"I'm really sorry about this Samantha. I just haven't been able to keep anything down, and now with Freddie's dad coming back and-"

"Miss B, I said it's okay."

In the past I would have been furious if Miss Benson had puked on me, but given the circumstances, I wasn't mad. I mean, her ex coming back while she's carrying another guy's baby would be enough to make anybody hurl. I sure don't envy her at all.

"I suppose I should get this cleaned up."

"I'll help." I volunteered

"Oh, no no no. You have to get yourself cleaned up. The towels and spare robes are in the closet to the left of the bathroom."

"Oh, okay."

Miss B made her way to the kitchen, and I, drenched in puke, made my way to the closet.

"Feel free to use my body wash." Miss Benson called out

"'Kay."

I sure hope Spence didn't get rid of Carly's clothes yet...Boy, this is gonna be weird. I used to borrow Carly's clothes all the time, but now that she's gone...

"Here I go again." I whispered as the lump formed in my throat


	18. Implosion

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: blank**

**...**

**#17-"Implosion"**

**Freddie's view**

I rushed back across the hallway to Spencer's apartment in search of some of Carly's clothes. Mom had unceremoniously unleashed a torrent of vomit all over Sam, and ruined the clothes she was wearing.

"Spencer?" I called as I let myself into his pad

He looked up from what appeared to be the blueprint for the baby's crib.

"Is everything alright?" He asked, his face filed with concern

I told him that my mother was troubled about something when I left, but I asked that he stay behind and wait for the report. Believe me, it wasn't easy convincing the father of Mom's baby to wait on word of her condition, but he finally complied.

"Well...First, did you give Carly's clothes away yer?"

Spencer looked at me quizzically.

"Um, no. I haven't gotten around to that yet. Why exactly?"  
"Because, my mom unloaded a puke bomb all over Sam."

"Ooooh...Well, you can go grab Sam something to wear."

"Cool, thanks."

"And tell her she can have it, whatever you grab her."

Thank goodness Spencer still had Carly's clothes, because Sam was a mess. It's a miracle she didn't try to pound Mom for doing that to her, but then again, Sam's been a lot more mellow for quite a while. I like mellow Sam...a lot.

I went into Carly's room and found Wendy going through a box of Carly's things. She looked at me as though I caught her trying to crack a safe.

"O-Oh, you're back."

"Yeah."

"Um, Spencer said I could take something of Carly's if I wanted." said the redhead

"It's okay Wendy. You were her friend too."

"Is everything alright with your mom?"

"...I wish I could say yes."

Wendy put down one of Carly's plush teddy bears and walked over to me.

"Why can't you say yes?"

"I can't...I need to find some of Carly's clothes. My mom showed Sam what she had for dinner the hard way."

"...She puked on Sam?"

"Yeah." I absently uttered as I searched through a box marked 'Carly's clothes'

"Sam didn't kill her did she?"

"No. She was actually understanding, if you can believe that."

I found a yellow t-shirt that read "Princess" across the front in baseball style font, a pair of blue denim shorts, and a pair of black flip-flops. Sam wasn't fond of showing her feet, but it was about the only thing I could find that might fit her, being how Carly's feet were bigger than Sam's. I wasn't sure though if I should rummage through Carly's underwear. In fact, I down right didn't want to, the gentleman that I am of course. But I figured it wouldn't hurt to ask Wendy to do it...

"Um...Wendy, you think you could do me a favor?"

"What?"

"Could you sorta, um..."

"What Freddie?"

"Look for some of Carly's underwear?" I spat out, red-faced as ever

"Uhhhh...I...guess." Wendy replied, almost as red-faced as I was

Wendy began rummaging through boxes of Carly's clothes, and about two minutes later she emerged with a pair of plain pink panties. I was ashamed to actually look at them head on, and when Wendy tried to hand them to me, I ordered her to just sit them atop the clothes I held in my arms.

"Thanks Wendy."

"Yeah, no big. Never thought I'd ever rummage through Carly's skivvies, but..."

I gave Wendy a small chuckle and headed to the door.

**Sam's view**

I stepped out of the bathroom in a white terrycloth bathrobe, and was met by Freddie . He held a bundle of clothes in his arms, including a pair of pink panties.

"Here." He said, refusing to look at the panties that were situated on top of the pile

"Thanks."

I went back into the bathroom and quickly changed into my best friend's garments. Although I used to always borrow Carly's clothes (and stain them, tear them, lose them), it felt surreal putting them on now that she wasn't here.

I pushed past the surreal feeling (and urge to yet again cry), and made my way out of the bathroom again. I found Freddie in the living room on the couch. He must have heard me come out, as he turned to me.

"Good fit." he said

"Duh. I used to always wear Carly's clothes, remember?"

"Yeah...It, um, doesn't feel weird does it?" Freddie asked

"Yeah, it does. But, they're just clothes...Not thrilled with the flip-flops though." I admitted as I stared down at my toes

"Sorry. I knew Carly's feet were bigger so I got what I thought was gonna fit best."

"Aww, always looking out for me." I teased

"Of course." Freddie chuckled

"My hero...So, now what?"

"What?"

"The promo shoot."

"Oh. Well, we can still do it if you want to."

"Def'."

**Wendy's view**

"...And we're clear." Freddie announced

We finally finished shooting the very first promotional video for SamNation, and it would go live in a matter of minutes...well, not really live 'cause we taped it, but I guess live in the sense that it would...

Okay, I'm totally rambling. Sorries.

"Great job ladies."

"Hey, that was only the promo. Congratulate us once we actually premier." Sam said

"Yeah Freddie." I agreed

"Okay, okay. No praise for you yet, ha ha...Boy, I sure am thirsty. I could go for a smoothie..."

"Me too. Go get us some." Sam basically ordered

"Sorry senorita, I got to prepare the live feed for the promo."

"Well then give me the money."

"My treat again I see."

"What else is new?"

"Don't worry Freddie. I'll buy." I stepped in

"Big surprise." Sam hissed "What the hell _won't_ you buy for us, Wendy?"

That tore it. I was sick and tired of Sam's bitchiness toward Freddie and a lot of other kids. I was not afraid of her, and I was ready to tell her what for once and for all.

"I don't know, _Sam_. But a new attitude certainly isn't out of the budget."

"Who said I cared about what you think of my attitude?"

"Oh, I forgot. You're Sam Puckett, and you don't care about anything except what your own selfish ass cares about."

"Hey, fuck you!"

"Fuck _you_!"

**Freddie's view**

What in the fucking hell is happening here?

I leapt up and put myself between Sam and Wendy in order to prevent a catfight (well, more like prevent Sam from beating Wendy to a bloody pulp)

"Ladies, stop!"

"Yeah, I'll stop!" Sam shouted "I'll stop having this fake bitch around!"

"Better to be a fake bitch than a _real_ bitch!"

Why did Wendy have to say that?

It was all I could do to coral Sam in my grasp as she tried to charge Wendy!

"Let me go!"

"Wendy, I think you should go now!" I suggested as Sam tried her best to wriggle out of my hold

"Yeah, I think so too!" Wendy shouted as she stormed out of the studio, me making sure she made it out without Sam getting her hands on her

I held Sam in place for about another fifteen seconds to make sure Wendy was out of dodge. I let her go, and she turned to me.

"What the fuck man!" she screamed

"Sam-"

"Fuck this! Fuck SamNation!" Sam shouted as she began sobbing

"Sam-"

"No. I can't Freddie. I just can't...I can't..."

Sam buried her face into my shoulder and sobbed uncontrollably. I wrapped my arms around her, and she did the same.

"I miss her so much." Sam sobbed "It hurts so much."

"I know Sam."

"Part of me died with her." Sam's muffled voice said

"Me too."

I was doing my best not to cry, but I was losing my grip.


	19. When does it stop hurting?

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Sam beat me up and took my ham sandwich...again**

**...**

**#18-"When does it stop hurting?"**

**Spencer's view**

Wendy stormed out of my apartment without a word, looking pissed for some reason. I decided to abandon my work on Lottie/Charlie's crib to go upstairs and see exacty what was going on.

When I waked into the old iCary studio, I found Sam crying on Freddie's shouder. It was not unike how she cried on his shoulder at Carly's funeral.

If anybody's been hit the hardest by my baby sister's death, it's Sam. She's a tough kid, but she had it rough most of her life. Carly was the angel that Sam needed when she needed one the most, and my baby sister took care of her. There was nothing Carly wouldn't do for Sam, be it money, a place to stay, food, anything. They were, for all intents and purposes, sisters. Carly was my blood sister, but I can't imagine losing the kind of sister Carly was to Sam.

"Kiddo?" I called out as I approached Sam, her face buried in Freddie's shoulder

"It's okay Spence. Sam's just sad about Carly." Freddie whispered

"Come here Sam."

Freddie handed Sam over to me, and I wrapped her up in my arms. She sontinued her sobbing as I smoothed her blonde hair.

"Listen...I know you miss Carly. I know how much she meant to you. But think of something, Sam. We have a miracle on the way. A tiny, beautiful miracle's coming, something we can be happy about."

"Lottie's not Carly!" Sam shouted

"No, she's not. But she's her niece...or nephew. And I know you love her, or him, already, and I know you're gonna spoil that kid rotten. You're gonna teach my son or daughter everything you know, and you're gonna guard him or her with your life. At least that's what I'm counting on."

"Yeah." Sam whimpered

"That goes for me too." Freddie added

"Ha. You're gonna teach it how to be a geek?" Sam taunted as she separated from me

"Hey, no child of mine will ever be a geek...I mean, not that I'm calling you a geek Freddie."

"No offense taken."

"...Speaking of offended, Wendy bolted out of the place looking like she wanted to rip somebody's head off. What's up with that?" I asked

**Sam's view**

What's up with that? She's a fake stuck up bitch, that's what's up with that. All this time I though Wendy was cool, but I see who she really is now. I should have seen it sooner, like when she blackmailed her way onto SamNation. Red flag anyone?

"She's not who I thought she was, and I called her on it." I replied

"Oh...So I guess she's off SamNation."

"There is no SamNation."

Spencer's expression turned puzzled.

"No SamNation? Why not?"

"Because I don't want to." I replied, becoming annoyed at having to explain myself over and over

"Why not?"

I shot Spencer a look so vicious that he noticably trembled a little.

"Because...I...don't..._want to_!"

"Spence, it's better just to not press her about it." Freddie said

"But, what about your fans?"

**Freddie's view**

Sam looked down at the floor and giggled.

"Our fans...My best friend dies and all they want is for me to entertain them some more...Wendy wants in because she wants to be web-famous like me and Carly..."

Sam's tone was low, and frightening...

She wandered around the studio aimlessly for about a minute before she suddenly focused on my tech equipment.

"Like I give a fuck what they want. I want Carly...I want Carly alive and well, but am I gonna get that? Fuck no. All she is now is a tombstone at the cemetary..."

"Sam-"

"I can't get what I want, so fuck what everybody else wants!" Sam screamed as she stormed out of the studio

Spencer gave me a look that said 'Go after her', and I did so. I caught up with Sam in the studio's elevator just as the doors were closing.

"God, I do not need another speech Freddie! Get out!" Sam ordered as she pushed the closing doors back open with her arms

"I'm not going anywhere."

Sam huffed as the doors closed, and in seconds we were back on the first floor of Spencer's apartment. I let Sam step out before me, hoping she wouldn't make a beeline to the front door. She didn't. She just stood at the elevator and wrapped her arms around herself. I came from behind her and gingerly took hold of her shoulders.

"...When does it stop hurting?" Sam asked , her cracking voice almost desperate for an answer

Most people considered me a genius, but this was the one question I had no answer for.

"I don't know. I was hoping somebody could tell _me_." I replied

**Wendy's view**

After I left that mean witch Sam and her punching bag Freddie, I decided to go grab another smoothie to sip on the way home. I didn't live far from Bushwell Plaza, so I could make it on foot. The sun had gone down, but the streets in this neighborhood were well lit so I wasn't too worried. Besides, home was just a few blocks away.

As I sipped on my Mango Tango, I thought of the fight I had with Sam. I just can't believe that after Carly's death she's still the same evil bitch she always was. I don't know what possessed me to persuade her and Freddie to let me on their show...Okay, _blackmail _ my way onto their show. It doesn't matter though, because I'm out.

I had to pass back by Bushwell Plaza to start home, and when I did I heard a woman scream "No!" I looked at the parking lot where the scream came from and saw a woman struggling with a man over her purse!

"Give it up you old bitch! Don't make this get ugly!" the mugger shouted

"No!" the victim shouted back

I instinctively dropped my smoothie and darted to the mugging, intent on helping this poor woman!

"Leave her alone asshole!" I yelled as I got closer

The mugger heard me, but what I didn't count on was him pulling out a gun...

The bang was loud...I looked down at my stomach, and the area where my teal shirt had somehow beome red...My stomach hurt really badly...

Then the world went black...

**Freddie's view**

I was finally able to console Sam, and I convinced her to come over to my place and hang out for a while. Sam and I were sitting in my living room watching Girly Cow when suddenly we heard what sounded like a gunshot and an ear-piercing scream from outside.

"What the hell!" Sam shrieked

Sam was as shocked as I was, because violence was practically non-existent in our neighborhood.

I got up to go look out the window, buit Sam pulled me back down by ny shirt.

"Are you stupid! You don't go peering out the window when somebody's bustin' off!"

Sam came from a neighborhood where violence was more common, so she would know about this kind of thing.

I sat in place, but I had a bad feeling about what had happened.

Mom came from her room in her pajamas with a worried look on her face.

"Did you hear that?" she asked us

"Yeah, we did. Sounded like somebody got shot." I replied

"Oh my God...What is this neighborhood coming to?"

Mom went to the window before Sam could stop her and looked out.

"Oh my God! Somebody _has_ been shot! It looks like a girl!"

Sam and I went tothe window and looked. A small crowd had gathered around what looked like a girl around me and Sam's age...in fact, she looked familiar...

"Wendy!" Sam shrieked

**A/N: Does Wendy die,or does she survive? You tell me. Hehehehe**


	20. God, where art thou?

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly**

**...**

**#19-"God, where art thou?"**

**Sam's view**

Freddie and I made a beeline to the area outside Bushwell where Wendy lay lifeless. We fought our way through the crowd and were mortified to see her drowning in a pool of her own blood.

"Wendy!"

She seemed to still be alive, but barely, and even then her time looked like it was running out as the pool of her blood grew bigger.

Freddie and I knelt at opposite sides of her and we each took one of her hands.

"Wendy, can you hear me?" Freddie asked in a forceful but calm tone

"Mmm..." Wendy groaned

"She's still alive."

"Yeah, but not for long if somebody doesn't call a fucking ambulance!" I screamed

"We did young lady." a tall black man replied

"What happened!" I demanded to know

A kind looking old lady with silver hair stepped up toward us.

"The awful man who shot her was trying to take my purse. This poor girl was trying to save me, bless her heart." the old lady explained

"Oh my god..."

"Oh Lord, please don't take this dear child away. She was only doing what you would want of her. She's innocent Lord, and she has too much more work to do here. It's not her time Lord." the old lady said, her eyes closed and hands clasped in prayer

I felt a jolt of anger shoot through my spine.

How many nights did I spend saying the exact same things to God for Carly? I begged God not to take her, _begged_ him. I even offered my own life in exchange for her's. Carly was worth more to more people than me, and I would have gladly died in her place. but did he listen? No!

"God won't help her." I mumbled

Freddie looked at me puzzeled, but I didn't give a damn.

"H-How could you say that young lady? God loves all-"

"God doesn't give a fuck about her!" I shouted as I rose to my feet

"Sam, what are-"

"If God gave a fuck, she wouldn't have got shot in the first place for trying to save you! If God gave a fuck, my best friend wouldn't have had to suffer from leukemia and die! God doesn't give a fuck about Wendy, about me, about any of you!" I shouted to the sky, my fists clenched so tight that my fingernails pierced the palms of my hands

**Freddie's view**

"Sam, stop this!" I barked as I met her eye-to-eye

"Fuck _you_ nub!"

The look in Sam's eyes was frightening, and not just in the 'Sam-Puckett-frightening' way. This was the look of a person on the brink and no net to catch her when she fell.

"Sam, Wendy's in trouble! This isn't the time for that!"

"Then when!"

In the distance we heard the sound of sirens, meaning either the ambulance or the police was on it's way. I hadn't noticed Mom had come down too and began tending to Wendy.

An ambulance hastily pulled up in the parking lot and three EMTs fell out of it. Just a few short moments later a squad car pulled into the parking lot.

Sam, Mom, and I watched as the EMTs tended to Wendy and as the police took a statement from the old lady who Wendy tried to rescue. Mom rubbed her tummy and sighed.

"That poor girl..." she whispered

Mom then suddenly wrapped her arms around me and Sam. Sam flinched at first, but accepted Mom's embrace.

"You poor kids. To have this happen after losing Carly."

"..."

I'll admit, Wendy wasn't anywhere near as close to us as Carly, but she was a friend, and it was painful to have another tragedy befall me and Sam. I just hoped to God Wendy wouldn't die. I couldn't stomach yet another funeral.

**Sam's view**

The Bensons and I were back up in their apartment. They had taken Wendy to the hospital. The police declared the parking lot a crime scene and shooed everybody away. I anxiously chewed on a piece of ham (Freddie began keeping a supply on hand once I established his place as a hangout), wondering what was happening with Wendy.

I felt like such a tool for the fight we had, and the thought of that possibly being my last memory of her frightened me. I vowed that if she made it, I would immediately apologize.

"...Do you think Wendy's okay?" I asked Freddie, who sat next to me on the couch

"I don't know..." he muttered in response

"...I hope she's okay...I was mad at her, but I didn't want her to...I can't go to another funeral, not again."

"I know...I've been to three too many already."

"Three?"

"Yeah. Carly's, my grandma, and one of my aunts."

"Oh. You're a funeral veteran eh?"

"Yeah, and I don't want anymore experience."

"Me neither...Hey, I'm sorry about that whole tantrum I had down there."

"You don't have to apologize for that, Sam."

"Well I do anyway..."

I looked at my watch and notic4ed it had gotten really late.

"I should get going. Melanie's coming in the morning you know."

"O-Oh, right. Forgot about that."

"You did not. Now that you know she's real you want in her drawers." I teased

"I do not!"

"My, my. Aren't we defensive?"

"J-Just shut up!"

"Ha ha ha."

He's so easy to rattle. The truth is, though, that Freddie's crushing on Melanie just as much as she is him, and I know it. It'll be interesting to see what goes down this weekend.

"I'm outta here." I said as I stood up and walked to the door

"Where do you think you're going?" Miss B asked from the hallway leading to her bedroom

"Home."

"Oh, I don't think so. Not when there's a psycho mugger on the loose."

"But-"

"I'll bring you home. We can pick up your clothes from the laundry room on the way out."

Miss B took the liberty of washing my clothes after she puked on me. The shoes, though, were ruined (and one of my favorite pairs no less).

"I'm coming with you then." Freddie announced

**Wendy's view**

_Where am I?_

_Everything's all white..._

_How did I get here? I remember getting shot, but..._

_I looked down at my stomach. There was no bullet wound, no blood. There was no pain either._

_"Hey Wendy."_

_Who said that?_

_"Over here."_

_I turned to the source of the voice._

_"Carly?"_

_Carly was right there in front of me..._

_"Yeah."_

_"...Is this a dream? Or am I...am I dead too? Carly, am I dead? Is this Heaven?"_

_"Not exactly. This is the passing area into your final destination."_

_"Heaven?"_

_"How should iknow? You may be destined for the _other_ place." Carly said as she pointed to the floor_

_"H-Hell?"_

_"Depends. But, I doubt you're going down there when it's your time. You're here because you did a very noble thing, and that wasn't lost on _Him_. They told me to send you back."_

_"Back?"_

_"To the Mortal plane. Sorry to say, but it's not your time yet."_

_"Oh..."_

_"Go back now. Shoo."_

_"Umm..."_

_I looked around at my surroundings, but all I saw was white. Where exactly was I supposed to go?_

_"Where is out?"_

_"Oh, sorry. I'm new at this passing area attendant job."_

_"They make you work in Heaven?"_

_"Well, they don't _make_ you work. I just volunteered for this job."_

_"Why?"_

_Carly looked down at her bare feet..._

_"...So I could intercept Spencer in case he did something drastic."_

_"I see...Well, you know he's got a baby on the way. You'll never-"_

_"I know. Miss Benson's having my niece." Carly said, smiling ear-to-ear_

_"Isn't that, like, major weird?"_

_"Ha...I'll admit, I wouldn't have understood it in my past life. But, it is what it is."_

_"...Wait, you said 'niece'. How do you know it's a girl?"_

_"I, um, sorta have privy to certain information. Ha ha."_

_"...Everybody misses you so much Carly."_

_"I know. I miss everybody so much. I wish I could go home." Carly uttered, looking like she wanted to cry_

_"Can't you ask God to-"_

_"No. It doesn't work like that."_

_"Oh..."_

_"Don't feel sorry for me. Just do me a favor. Look out for everybody. Don't fight with Sam. She's not as bad as you think she is. She just takes a lot of patience."_

_"'kay..."_

_"And convince her to do SamNation! I'm so eager to see it!"_

_"Okay." I giggled_

_"And tell everyone I love them, and I'll be watching them."_

_"I will."_

_"That goes for you too. I love you Wendy."_

_"I love you too." i whispered as a tear fell from my eye_

_"Now shoo."_

_"But, how?"_

_"Close your eyes, and think of home."_

_"I thought this was Heaven, not the Wizard of Oz."_

_"Just do it."_

_"Okay, okay..."_


	21. Back to the crib

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Bleh**

**A/N: Thank you everybody for the reviews and for the alerts and favoriting. It's the fuel that keeps this train moving ;)**

**...**

**#20-"Back to the crib"**

**Sam's view**

I couldn't sleep at all last night. I spent the night tossing and turning in my bed, thinking about Wendy, wondering what was going on with her, and worrying.

The image of her lying in a pool of her own blood was singed in my mind, and would be forever. I've seen some scary things in my life, but when it's a friend...

I wondered if they caught the perp who did it. I sure hoped so. He had to pay for what he did.

I tried calling the hospital for her status, but they wouldn't release any information over the phone about Wendy since she the victim of a violent crime. All I could do was pray she was alright, or as alright as could be expected.

"Sam?" Momma called from my door

I rolled over in my bed and faced her.

"Yeah?"

"I'm goin' to get your sister from the airport. Get up and get ready."

"Yeah, yeah."

I hadn't bothered to take off my clothes (well, Carly's old clothes) last night, but I wanted to change. I figured since I took a shower at the Bensons' last night (God that still sounds weird) that I didn't need to shower right then.

I decided on a pair of gray shorts and a blue t-shirt. I slipped on the same flip-flops that Freddie scavenged for me yesterday. I usually don't like my feet being exposed, but the flips were uber-comfortable, and it was going to be warm anyway.

I bolted downstairs, where Momma waited by the front door.

"Ready?" She asked

"Yup. Let's go get my better half."

We left out, me locking the door behind us, and got in Momma's white pickup truck.

I didn't show it, but to be honest, I was looking forward to seeing Mel.

I front like I don't like her because she's a goody-goody nerd, but the fact is I couldn't be prouder of Melanie. She's been a straight-A student ever since first grade, something I teased her over to no end. I used to get mad that Melanie did better than me in school, but truth be told, I only had myself to blame. I was too preoccupied with bullshit to study like her...and too lazy, which is something Carly always nagged me about. I stepped my game up over the past year though, and now I proudly earn a 2.9 average (with a_ lot _of help from Freddie and Carly). It's not Melanie-good, but it beats the hell out of what I used to average (I'd rather not say what my old average was)

Momma drove and I rode toward the Sea-Tac airport without saying much, that is until Momma suddenly asked me something.

"You looked like something was eatin' you when you came in last night. You okay?"

"Huh? Oh..."

I hadn't told Momma about Wendy. I went straight to my room after muttering 'Hey' to her.

"...Something really bad happened to a friend of mine." I mumbled

"What?"

"...She got shot by some thug outside Bushwell."

"Holy crap. Is she okay?"

"I don't know. I don't even know if she's alive."

"How the hell did _that_ happen?"

"Apparently she was trying to stop a purse snatching."

"Oh my God...Well _that_ wasn't smart."

"No...But it was noble."

We rode the rest of the way in silence. Momma had ticked me off with her 'that wasn't smart' comment, but I didn't show it.

I felt a twinge in my stomach as I thought of Wendy. I was worried that she didn't make it, and that our last moment would be an ugly one. I wanted to apologize to her so bad for flying off the handle, and I worried I wouldn't get the chance.

"Sam, I got a feelin' that's not the only thing botherin' you." Mom said

"...It's not." I replied in a half-whisper

"Spill then."

"...We, um...We had a fight before she got shot."

"Oh..." Momma uttered

"Now I don't even know if she's alive, and my last memory of her could be... her laying in a pool of her own blood."

I tried, but I couldn't stop the stream of tears from spilling out of my eyes.

Momma pulled over and stopped the car. She leaned over and held my head on her shoulder.

"...I'm sorry, Sam." Momma whispered

At that point I had cried more times than I had ever cried in my life. Why was life giving me more and more reasons to cry?

**Spencer's view**

"Phew..."

I wiped the sweat from my brow and admired an almost-complete crib. I stayed up all night working on it, and it was almost ready for the wood finisher.

The crib was just the first of many things I was gonna make for my baby. By the time Lottie or Charlie got here, they'd have a whole bedroom full of stuff...

Which reminded me that I was going to have to go back to the hardware store and get more lumber.

I looked at the clock on the kitchen wall and saw it was 9-o'-clock, which is when the hardware store opens. Having been up working all night I would need a shower. I took my goggles off and started toward the stairs when I heard a knock at the door.

"Spencer?"

It was Marissa.

Oh, crap. I wanted the baby's things to be a surprise...

"Spencer, I know you're in there. Please let me in. We need to talk."

I sighed, figuring whatever Marissa needed to talk about was more important than surprising her. She was carrying my baby, and that mattered to me first.

"Hey Marissa." I greeted as I swung the front door open

"Spencer."

"So...You said we needed to talk?"

"Aren't you going to invite me in?"

"Oh, sorry."

I made way for Marissa, who immediately took notice of the crib. She gasped and put her hand over her mouth.

"Oh my God...Spencer, is that a crib?"

"Yeah...I made it from scratch for our baby. I wanted to surprise you."

"Oh my God..."

Marissa went over to the crib and looked over it in awe...

"...It's beautiful...You did this all by yourself?"

"Yup." I replied, not checking the pride in my tone

"Wow..."

"That's not the only thing I'm making though. Our baby's gonna have a complete room. The bassinet is next up."

My baby's mother turned to me with eyes glossed over.

"...Our baby has the most wonderful father." she said with a broken voice

I sure hope I can live up to those words...


	22. Torn

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Blah**

**...**

**#21-"Torn"**

**Marissa's view**

I wanted to cry, looking at the beautiful crib that Spencer constructed for our baby. I'd heard the racket from his apartment, but I assumed he was only making another piece of art. I had no idea he was making our baby's crib.

Spencer was really on board for being a daddy, and as happy as that made me, I felt conflicted.

I'll explain. Fredward's father is back in town, and I already explained that to Freddie. What I _didn't_ tell Freddie was that his father wants me to take him back.

As we talked over the phone, I remembered how much I did love Jacob Benson. Part of me wanted to tell him to come home, but another part of me wanted to hang up and forget he ever called. I was still angry with Jacob, yet still in love with him. Hearing his voice again brought me back to the time when Freddie was just a little boy. We were a happy family...and Jacob wanted that for us again.

But why should I give him that? _He's_ the one who (please forgive me for swearing) fucked everything up. I didn't cheat, I didn't have another man on the side. I was the perfect wife. There is no good reason why I should take Jacob back...

That's what my mind says at least. But my heart remembers Jacob...

Why did he have to come back now? Now that I'm with Spencer's baby and... in love with him...

**Spencer's view**

Marissa looked lost in thought as she caressed the unfinished crib.

"...Marissa, you said you wanted to talk about something?"

My baby's mother slowly turned her head toward me. Her eyes were somber...

"...Spencer, what are we?"

"...What do you mean?"

"What are we? You and I?"

"Oh, that's easy. We're human." I joked, but Marissa remained serious

"Spencer, I mean...where do we stand? Am I just your baby's mother, or..."

"What? Of course you're not just my baby's mother. You're..."

Damn...

What _is _Marissa to me?

She was a great friend to me while I was going through watching my baby sister fade away...She was my secret lover...Now she's my baby's mother...But what is she really?

"You're-"

"Don't answer that." Marissa cut in "It's apparent you aren't ready to."

Did I hear a twinge of anger in her voice?

"Yes I am." I hastily replied

"...Then?"

"...You're mine." I asked more than declared, making me feel like a total lamer

"I'm yours? That's it?"

"Well what do you want, for me to propose?" I asked, becoming angry myself

"I didn't say that."

"Then what? What do you want Marissa? You tell me."

"What do _you_ want?"

"I told you, I want you to be mine." I almost yelled

"...Then there's a problem."

"...What kind of problem?" I asked

"Spencer...There's something I have to tell you."

"I'm listening."

"Um...It's about Freddie's father, my ex-husband."

"...What about him?"

"Um...He's...He's back in town, and..."

"And?"

"...He wants me and Freddie back." Marissa shyly uttered

I heard what she said, but the words were long in processing through my brain. Once I digested it, I felt a sudden rush of rage shoot up my spine.

"The day that son of a bitch takes you and my baby from me is the day I die." I replied, doing my best not to shout

I knew the entire story of how Freddie's father walked out on him and Marissa, and there was no way that piece of shit was going to be anywhere near my baby or it's mother.

"Spencer-"

"No! Marissa, he walked on you and Freddie. How could you even _think_ about taking him back?"

"I didn't say I was!"

"Not out loud! But I saw it when you said he was back and wanted you back! I'm not as stupid as you think!"

"I never thought you were stupid!"

"Yeah, maybe _after_ we started fucking!"

"Well if I remember correctly, you initiated the whole thing!"

"You didn't refuse!"

"..."

Marissa's eyes spilled over with tears, and my heart cracked...

"I'm sorry Marissa." I calmly apologized

"No, I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for."

"Yes I do. Here I am basically demanding you call me your girlfriend and telling you my ex is back and...God, this pregnancy is making me crazy already." Marissa groaned as she plopped on my couch

I sat next to her. I wanted to hug her, but I was still quite sweaty from the work I was doing.

"You and me both." I joked

Marissa looked at me and smiled.

"You think the pregnancy is hard? Wait until Charlottie is actually here."

"Charlottie?"

"It's a smush of Charlie and Lottie. Wendy came up with it so we wouldn't have to say Charlie-or-Lottie anymore...That poor girl."

"Yeah."

I hadn't heard the commotion outside because I was running power tools and was on the opposite side of the building to where it happened, but I definitely got wind of what happened to Wendy last night.

"I hope she's okay. I'm going to make a point of checking on her situation once I get to work."

"...Makes me feel sorry for her parents."

"Oh, definitely."

Having never been a father before, I never knew what it was to truly fear for a child. Now that I was going to be one, what happened to Wendy made me realize how much having a child means.

I wonder how a man like Jacob Benson could just walk away from his own son. I would never walk away from Charlottie, and I'll be damned if he comes between me and his or her mother. Let him come. I'm more than ready.


	23. Choose your misery

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: No thanks**

**...**

**#22-"Choose your misery"**

**Melanie's view**

I tapped my right foot and bobbed my head in time with the music that was piping into my ears from my PearPod. I was standing outside of the airport with my luggage, waiting for my mother to pick me up.

I wasn't able to come home for Carly's funeral because of a major thunderstorm over Michigan, which meant no flights were going out. You could imagine how angry and sad that made me. Carly and I didn't know each other very well, but I did like her and wanted to pay my respects. I also wanted to be there for Sam, because I knew how hard she was taking Carly's death.

But, I'm here now, if only for the weekend. I can't wait to see Momma and Sam. From what Sam's told me in our phone conversations, things are way different at home, and I'm eager to see just how so. I'm also eager to see a certain boy by the name of Freddie Benson, the boy of my dreams...

In the distance I saw a white pickup truck pull into the roundabout of the airport. I knew that truck anywhere, and it was my mother's...

**Sam's view**

"There she is." I said, spotting my twin sister and her bags

"I know what my own kid looks like." Momma uttered as she pulled up in front of the airport

I exited the truck and met up with Melanie.

"Sam!"

"What up Mel?"

Melanie grabbed me into a fierce hug, and I returned it. I didn't want to admit it, but I missed her and I'm happy she's home.

""I'm so sorry I couldn't be at the funeral." Mel whispered in my ear

"That wasn't your fault."

"But if I would have booked a flight for earlier-"

"Mel, it wasn't your fault. You're here now, that's all that matters." I said as we let each other go

Momma gently pushed me aside and hugged Melanie tightly.

"Hey Momma."

"Hey you."

"I'll load her up." I said as I took one of Mel's bags and threw it into the bed of Momma's pickup

"Sam, I have delicate stuff in these bags!" Mel whined

"My bad."

"Momma!"

"Sam, be careful with Melanie's stuff!" Momma yelled

"Yeah, yeah."

I more 'carefully' put Mel's other two bags into the bed.

"Alright, let's ride." Momma ordered

"Shotgun." I called

If there's one thing I hate, it's being squeezed in the middle of the cab of Momma's truck. I must have the window seat.

"You had shotgun last time." Mel complained

"So?"

"Sam, Mel gets shotgun."

"But Momma-"

"She's home for the weekend, and she gets the perks."

"Man..."

I dejectedly got in the cab and scooched over toward the driver's side. Melanie and Momma then got in and squished me into the middle of the cab. We then rode out of the Sea-Tac and hit the road...

"Why the hell won't you just spring for a car?" I mumbled

"Because nobody will buy this piece of junk and I ain't got money for another ride. It's enough to keep a roof over our heads and your bottomless pit of a belly full."

Melanie giggled at Momma's little jab.

"Shut up, Mela-nerd." I hissed

"Don't call me nerd."

"Nerd. No wonder you like Freddie. You're just as much of a geek as he is."

"I thought _you_ were the one who liked Freddie." Momma countered

"How many times do I gotta tell you I don't like Freddie!"

"Then what was that kiss about?" Melanie taunted

"I told you, it was just to get my stupid damn first kiss out of the way!"

"What's next? Gonna bang him just to get your first time outta the way?" Momma teased

"No!"

Those two were having a blast in tag-team embarrassing me. It didn't help that I was uncomfortable as hell in between them either.

"Nobody just kisses for the heck of it." said my nerd sister

"Well I did!"

"You so like him."

"No, that would be _you_! You kissed him too, remember?"

"Didn't count. He thought I was you."

"Didn't count my ass. You were, and _are_, totally into Freddie."

"I won't deny that, but you are too. You're my twin, and I know you inside and out."

"Keep saying I'm into Freddie and I'll _tear_ your insides out!"

"Ladies, that's enough!" Momma barked as she navigated the road

Both of us 'Hmphed' at the same time and went silent. When Momma said shut up, it meant shut the fuck up or else.

The rest of the ride home was quiet. Once we pulled into the driveway of Casa Puckett, I was finally let out from my middle-seat trap by Melanie, only to go and grab her luggage and drag it in the house.

"Thanks Sam." Melanie said as I lugged her luggage upstairs to her room

"Welcome."

Melanie's room was exactly how she left it; Clean, nice-smelling, and girly. The total opposite of my room basically.

But, that's how we are. Total opposites. She's nice, I'm a jerk. I'm messy, she's neat. She's smart, I'm...well, I'm not dumb, but I don't work hard in school like her. Anyways, we've just always been opposites. But, I love the gal anyway.

"I brought you something." Melanie said as she unzipped one of her suitcases

"For reals?"

Hey, I love free shit as much as the next guy, especially in edible form.

Mel reached in and presented me with...

"Oh my God!"

A Shirehills Ranch summer sausage!

"Here."

"For me?"

"Yup."

I hadn't had breakfast this morning, and seeing that beautiful specimen of cased meat known as a summer sausage made me realize how hungry I was. I ripped the plastic wrapping open with my teeth and began devouring the meat stick.

"Thanks!"

"You're welcome. There's a Shirehills outlet store not too far from school."

"They're based in Michigan?"

"Yup."

"I never knew that."

As I worked on my sausage, Melanie began unloading her things onto her bed.

"So how's things going at school?" I asked in between a bite

"Okay."

Mel didn't sound too enthusiastic.

"Just okay?"

"Yeah. I mean, nothing great's going on. Just the same old."

"Don't sound too happy."

"..."

Twin sister folded a pink blouse of hers and sighed.

"...That's because I'm not..."

"Why not? Somebody bothering you?" I asked with a mouthful of sausage (go ahead and laugh you pervs)

"No, it's not that."

"Then what?"

"...I wanna come home, Sam." she said softly

I could then see the sorrow behind my sister's eyes...

"...Mel, you're in one of the best schools in America. You really wanna just piss that away?"

"Fuck that stuffy ass school."

Whoa. Mel just cussed. Mel _never_ cusses...

"I don't give a damn about going there anymore. I'm away from everybody I know, I don't have any friends, the faculty is mean and uptight, the town is boring as fuck, and I can't take it anymore. I wanna come home for good and go to a _normal_ school. I wanna go to school with you, and Freddie."

Mel's eyes welled up with tears, tears that spilled over onto her white sundress.

"Then why don't you just tell Momma?" I asked, trying hard not to cry myself

"Because she'd smack me into next week if I talked about quitting private school. Did you forget? I'm the great hope of the Puckett family."

That comment stung a little, but it was true. Out of us two, Melanie was the one who was supposed to be somebody, and Momma would indeed be upset if Mel gave up her scholarship to go to 'lowly' public school.

"I think you're underestimating Momma. She won't wig-out if you tell her you wanna quit private school."

"You mean _our_ mother? The one who heaped the future of the Pucketts on my back?"

"...Melanie, listen. You're gonna have to choose your misery. Either tell Momma how you feel or go back to Michigan."

"Michigan...Shaped like a mitten, feels like an iron grip." Melanie chuckled'

"Ha ha...Look, I'd really like it if you came to school with me. Maybe we could convince Momma to let you come home together."

"Wait, did you say you'd _like_ me to go to school with you?"  
"Yeah, yeah." I grumbled "But are you sure that's what you really want? I mean, _really_ sure?"

"..."

Melanie fidgeted with her hands and looked down at her purple carpet.

"No...I mean, I worked so hard to get that scholarship. Do I really just want to throw it away just because I'm homesick and uncomfortable?"

I instinctively walked over and put my sausage-free hand on Mel's shoulder.

"You can't make this kind of decision in one minute Mel. You need to really think about this."

"I know."

Melanie turned away and silently wept as she continued unpacking.

**A/N: I chose Michigan to be where Melanie's private school is based because I myself am from Michigan, Detroit to be exact. The 313 in my pen name is in fact Detroit's area code.**


	24. Croissants and homecomings

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: What if writing fanfiction was ruled illegal? That would blow.**

**...**

**#23-"Croissants and homecomings"**

**Freddie's view**

It was Saturday morning, and I sat in front of my computer, finally doing the pc maintenance I'd been putting off for a while. I really didn't have anything better to do. I wished Sam would call and ask to hang...Heh, just last year I would have dreaded Sam calling, and she certainly wouldn't want to hang with _me_, so that wouldn't have happened anyway.

"Knock, knock." Mom announced as she entered the room

"Hey pregnant lady." I replied, not looking her way

"I wish you wouldn't call me that Fredward."

"Okay pregnant lady."

"Nevermind you, smart aleck. Anyway, I'm about to go to the grocery store. Do you want to come?"

"No, I'm sorta busy."

"Oh, well. I have some other errands too, so I'll be a while."

"Roger that."

"...Freddie."

"Yeah?"

"...If your dad calls or comes over, ignore him."

"...I'll ignore him just like he ignored me." I said in a tone that must have sent a chill down Mom's spine

"Okay...I'll be back."

Mom quietly left, leaving my door open...

Ignore him. Ha. I _wish_ he'd show up. I have a fist for his nose that's been cocked and ready to fire for years now. No way I'm ignoring him.

I continued my oh so tedious work, hoping for Sam to call. I figured she might not though, being how Melanie was back today. Just when I was done with an important part of my maintenance, I heard my PearPhone give off the tone that signals Sam is calling (If you must know, it's a voice recording of Sam herself saying "Yo, pick up the phone Frederina. Momma be calling. Ignore me and you die.". She forbade me to delete it too, but, it's grown on me).

I retrieved my phone from off my nightstand and turned it on...

"Hola." I answered

"What you doin'?" Sam replied

"Oh, just doing maintenance on my computer. I've been putting-"

"Boring."

"Well you asked, remember?"

"Don't care."

"Oh, well I suppose what _you're_ doing is oh so much more interesting."

"Nah, not really. Melanie and my mom went out."

"Where?"

"Burger World."

"Burger World? And _you_ didn't go?"

"Nah. That's kinda _their_ thing whenever Mel comes home. Listen, I'm coming over. There better be ham."

"Uh, actually there isn't any."

"Then go get some. I'll be there in a few."

"Yeah, yeah." I groaned

Our call ended, and I put my phone on my desk.

Looks like I'll have to change out of my pajamas and get dressed. When Sam demands ham (or meat in general), pity the one who denies her.

**Melanie's view**

Momma pulled her truck into the parking lot of Burger World.

It was sort of a tradition that whenever I come home, me and Momma would have breakfast or whatever meal at Burger World. Unfortunately, Sam never wants to come. I don't know if it's because she doesn't want to be bothered, or if she just wants me and Momma to have the alone time, but it has to be a good reason why Sam would pass up meat and grease.

We collected our order (an egg & cheese croissant and hash browns for me, and a double sausage croissant and hash browns for Momma) and took a booth, sitting across from each other. I unwrapped my sandwich and began eating, waiting for Momma to say something.

"...So, how's school treatin' ya?" she asked

"It okay." I plainly replied

"Just okay?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, I go to class, I go to bed." I said with as little enthusiasm as I could muster

"...Mel, you can't fool your momma."

I looked at her, puzzled.

"H-How am I trying to fool you?"

"Mel, for about the past year, whenever you came home you would act more and more unenthusiastic about school each visit."

"Oh...Well, it's just that-"

"You're miserable in Michigan." Momma said

I literally dropped my sandwich, my eyes going as big as dinner plates...

"Am I right?" Momma asked as she cocked her head to the side

"Um...I miss home sometimes, but..."

"But you want to come home, don't you?"

"..."

A tear formed in my eye and threatened to spill over.

"I _hate_ it there Momma." I confessed with a shaky voice

Momma reached over and placed her hand over one of mine.

"I figured. You always looked like you were going off to prison when you went back to Michigan, as much as you tried to hide it."

"Ha..."

"...Mel, do you want to come home? I mean, _really_ come home?"

"What?"

"I ain't speakin' Greek girl. Do you want to come home? Go to school with Sam?"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing! Momma's offering me to come home!

"B-But, what about my future? Harvard and all that?"

"Who gives a damn about that?"

"I thought _you_ did. I thought I was supposed to be the Puckett who actually made something of herself. I-I mean, no offense to _you_."

"None taken...But you're right. I _did _pin all my expectations on you, and I did..._do_ want you to be the Puckett who becomes somebody. But after Carly got sick I had an epiphery."

"Um, it's 'epiphany'." I corrected

"Whatever you. Anyway, I realized how precious children are, and that they can be taken from you at any moment. That's why I've been trying to be a better mother and all...What kind of mother would I be if I forced my baby to be somewhere that makes her miserable?"

By then, the tears had come down my cheeks...

"So you're not mad I wanna quit private school?"

"Baby, there's millionaires who graduated from public school. Hell, there's ones who never even freakin' _graduated_. You don't need no fancy-pants private school diploma to be somebody, because you got what it takes already." Momma said, gently poking me on the forehead

"Ha ha...So I can really come home? No more Michigan?"

"You can really come home. Screw that school. Tell 'em to shove it. You come on home where you belong."

I shrieked and impulsively leapt up and almost tacked Momma into a hug!

"Mel, whoa! I said you could come home, not maul me!"

I can come home! No more private school! Now I get to go to school with Sam and Freddie!

Freddie...Now I can be his girlfriend. He'll be so happy.

**Freddie's view**

"Yo." Sam greeted as I let her into our apartment

"Hey."

Sam proceeded straight to the refrigerator, where I had her ham waiting.

"Good man." she called as she took it out and took out the pack

"I know how you feel about it. Plus I didn't want you to hurt me."

"Smart man too."

The two of us sat on the couch, and I turned the television on to (What else?) Girly Cow.

"A chaw?" Sam offered, holding the pack of ham in my face

"I'm good."

"More for me."

We sat and laughed at the stupid antics going on on the television for about five minutes. I heard a knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" Sam asked

"Ah, it's probably Big Spence."

I got up and went to the door and opened it, thinking it was Spencer.

I was wrong. As wrong as wrong could be...

**A/N: *Evilly twirls mustache* Mwuhahaha! I threw a Melanie-wrench into your Seddie! Mwuhahahaha!**

**You don't have to be a rocket scientist to know who was on the other side of Freddie's door. The question is, what will Freddie do about this visitor? Stay tuned my children.**


	25. Handling matters

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: What if writing fanfiction was ruled illegal? That would blow.**

**...**

**#24-"Handling matters"**

**Freddie's view**

There he stood. He looked like me, only a little bit taller and seventeen years older.

Jacob Benson. The man who walked out on me and Mom when I was a kid. There he stood, after all these years of pretending we didn't exist, save for the child support check he sent Mom every month.

No birthday acknowledgments, no Christmas presents, no graduation gifts, no nothing.

There he stood, looking like the pathetic son of a bitch he is.

"...Fredward. Is that you?"

"Yeah, it's me." I replied, feeling the ice roll of my tongue

"You've gotten big." he said, the nervousness in his voice crystal clear

"That's what kids do. They grow up."

"Ha...So, how have you-"

Before he could get "been" out of his mouth, I punched him as hard as I possibly could in his face. He stumbled backward and fell down against the wall in the hallway, clutching his nose.

"Freddie, what the hell!" Sam shrieked as she came up behind me

I shook my right hand, feeling just how hard I had hit Jacob. He still struggled to regain his composure, and Sam was in a state of shock over what she saw me do.

"God, that felt good." I sighed

Jacob struggled to his feet, still holding his nose, which was bleeding.

"Welcome home, Jake." I taunted as I stood in his face

"Agh..."

Sam stood by with a concerned look on her face.

"Freddie, what the hell's gotten into you?"

"The sight of this son of a bitch. Sam, meet my dear old man, Jacob Benson."

Wide eyed, Sam looked my father over. Her wide-eyed expression then turned to one of utter disgust.

"So, you're the loser who stepped on Freddie and his mom."

Jacob looked away sheepishly, still minding his nose (which I hoped I'd broken).

"I got half a mind to slug you one too. How dare you come back here? In case Freddie didn't make it clear, you're not wanted around here. I suggest you kick rocks, because I hit much harder than Freddie."

"Sam, chill. I got this." I said as I nudged Sam behind me

I walked up and got nose-to-nose with Jacob.

"I hate you." I said in no uncertain terms

"I know."

"You trashed me and Mom like we were nothing, and for what? A younger woman. Yeah, I know the whole story Jake. Mom got a little too old for your liking. What do you do when something gets too worn, say like a computer? You replace it. Computers, wives. When they wear out, you move on. Right?"

"Freddie, I don't know what your-"

"_Fredward_. Don't you ever call me Freddie again. And I don't care _what_ you don't know, because I know what I know, and that's that you're piece of shit."

Suddenly, the door of Spencer's apartment opened, with Spencer himself taking a peek out.

"...What's going on here?" the big man asked

"Oh, just having a happy reunion with my father." I said sarcastically, gaze still fixed on Jacob

Spencer came over and examined Jacob...

"...So, you're Mr. Benson." Spencer said in a dry tone

"Yes, I am."

"...You need to leave. Now."

"I came to see my family."

"You gave up that right a long time ago buddy." Spencer said, his tone growing hostile

"Who the hell are _you_?"

"The man who will kill you if you bother Marissa and Freddie."

"What, are you her boyfriend or something?" Jacob asked, now going on the defensive

"I'm the father of her baby, and I swear to God if you cause any trouble for her or Freddie I will call in a favor and make sure your body is _never _found."

"Wait, Marissa had a baby?"

"That's none of your fucking business. Get the hell out of this building, and don't ever come back. Because if I catch you here again, it's over for you."

Spencer and Jacob stared each other down for what seemed like an eternity, until Jacob finally took a last look at me and left for the elevator.

I had never seen the big guy be so aggressive and assertive, and I particularly loved that he owned my wastrel father.

"Damn, Big Spence." Sam breathed

"...Freddie, I meant what I said. If he comes back around to bother Lottie's mother or you, he's meat. I'll have Socko and the boys take care of him good fashion." Spencer vowed in a low growl

Spencer wasn't just blowing smoke either. He knows people, as in _knows people_. Spencer's a nice guy overall, but he's not a man to be trifled with for too long. Now that it's the mother of his child involved, Spencer will definitely not play around with my father. Part of me hopes Jacob is stupid enough to test Spencer. I'd love to see that son of a bitch on the 11-'o-clock news.

"You okay?" Sam asked as she picked up the hand I slugged Jacob with and examined it

"Never better. I've been waiting a looooooong time to do that."

My hand hurt like hell, and it was beet-red, but I didn't care. The sight of blood oozing out of Jacob's nose was well worth it.

"We should go ice this." said Sam

"Yeah...Hey, thanks Spence."

Spencer only nodded and returned to his apartment. Sam lead me back inside of mine and to the kitchen, where she began making a makeshift ice pack with a Ziploc bag and ice from the freezer.

"Here you go, Mike Tyson." she said as she gave me the ice pack

"Thanks."

"...Didn't know you could throw a punch like that."

"Heh. Don't worry, I'm not gonna be challenging you for the title of 'toughest kid in school'."

"As if you ever could." Sam snorted

"No, I couldn't."

"...I hope that your father doesn't plan on making trouble for you guys. I wouldn't want you or Spencer to get into it with the law, especially now that Lottie or Charlie is on the way."

I sighed as I held the ice pack down on the back of my hand.

"I don't know what he's planning..."

There was a knock on the door. Sam and I looked at each other, probably having the same idea; Jacob came back. I got up and went to the door, Sam following right behind me. I opened it and-

"Freddie!"

-Was hugged (more like tackled) by a blonde girl in a white dress!

"Oof!"

"Hey you!"

The girl let me go and I regained my composure.

"Melanie? Hey!"

"Mel? What are you doing here? Where's Momma?" Sam asked

"I'm here to see Freddie silly. Momma dropped me off and went home. She didn't want to let me go, but I insisted on coming to see _you_."

I felt myself blush a little bit. No girl had ever popped by my house just to see me, well except for Carly and Sam, and even then it was just for iCarly business. No girl's ever come by my place to _visit_ me. Why am I rambling?

"Well, what can I say? I'm a special kinda guy, heh heh."

"Yeah, Special _Ed_." Sam taunted

"Oh my God! Freddie, what happened to your hand?" Melanie shrieked after finally noticing the ice pack and my red hand

"Oh, um...Just a little accident."

"Did Sam do this to you?"

"No, she didn't. It's nothing."

Melanie took my hand and examined it.

"It may be broken. You need a doctor."

"It's not broken. I'm fine Melanie, really."

"...Okay, if you say so. But I'm sure your mom is gonna want to know what happened." Mel cautioned

Mom most certainly was going to want to know what happened to my hand, and I would have to tell her I bashed her ex-husband's nose in.

"I know. I'll handle it when she comes back."


	26. Between women

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: What if writing fanfiction was ruled illegal? That would blow.**

**...**

**#25-"Between women"**

**Sarah's view**

After I dropped Mel of at that Bushwell Plaza I headed to the grocery store. I planned on makin' a big old dinner for my babies tonight to celebrate Mel coming home for good. Truth be told, I was happy she was coming back. I missed the kid like crazy, but I never let her know because I didn't want her to feel bad about it. Turns out, though, the girl was miserable in another way.

I may have been the most pathetic excuse for a mother over the years, but a mother knows when her kid is hurting. I knew Melanie was miserable in that mitten state, but I never said anything, until today at least. I suppose it's my fault. I'm the one who crowned Melanie the pride of the Puckett clan. I thought she would be excited to go to private school, and at first she was. But little by little I saw that excitement fade and be replaced by misery. Poor girl just put on a happy face and beared it, because she didn't want to let me down.

"You gotta be frickin' kidding me. This much for _this_?" I said to myself as I examined the price of a whole ham in the meat section

"Sarah?" a voice from behind called

I turned my head and saw that boy Freddie's mom, with her own shopping cart.

"Oh, hey Miranda."

"Um, it's Marissa actually."

"Oh, sorry. Never was good with names."

"Oh, that's okay. How have you been?"

"I've been holdin'. You know my girl Melanie, she's coming home from private school for good."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah. Kid's homesick like crazy, so I'm letting her quit and come on home."

"Aw, poor thing."

"I know. I wish she woulda said she didn't like it sooner, but what can you do?"

"Not much I suppose."

"...You know though, Mel has a thing for your boy. She asked me to drop her off at your place so ahe could 'say hi'." I said, doing air quotes on the 'say hi'

"Oh, I already knew that. Back when he didn't believe she was real."

"I remember. Mel was pretty frustrated about that."

"I could imagine. I'd be annoyed too if a guy I liked thought I was me trying to trick him into believing I was a twin..."

Marissa suddenly grabbed her stomach and her face got all twisted.

"You okay?" I asked

"...Yeah, just got a little queasy there...It's passing..."

"You eat something bad?"

"Oh, no...Um, actually, I'm expecting again."

"Whaaaat?"

"Yes, I'm pregnant Sarah."

"Ha ha ha! You go girl! Who's the daddy?" I chuckled

"Spencer."

"..._Spencer_? As in Carly's big brother?"

"The one and only." Marissa said as she looked down at the floor

"How the hell did you and _that_ hunk of meat hook up?"

"I don't know. It's all a blur really. One minute I'm comforting him as he was losing Carly, the next minute I'm in bed with him."

"Well, I ain't gonna judge. Get your freak on is what I say. So, what are you and Spencer? You an item or what?"

"We don't know. He says he wants to be, but..."

"But what?"

"...My ex-husband is back in town, and he wants to get back with me."

"Aww shit. That's not good."

"Tell me about it."

"Wait, you don't wanna get back with _him_ do you?"

Marissa took an eternity to answer me, which _gave _ me my answer.

"You wanna get back with him, don't you?"

"I've been thinking about it." Marissa blurted

"Ugh. Why the hell would you wanna get back with a man who bailed on you and your boy? Especially now that you're carryin' another man's kid? You _want_ a shitload of drama?"

"I don't know...He called me, and we talked, and I just thought about the good times...I know I sound crazy, but, deep down..."

"Oh, God, don't say it. Do not say you still love him. I will smack you."

"...Can I think it instead?"

"Oh my God. You're such a woman, Marissa. Let me tell you something. You can't give that asshole an inch. If you do, he's gonna feel like what he did was okay, and then he's gonna do it again. Trust me, I've taken back Sam and Mel's old man a million times, and it never changed. All those pretty promises about how he'll change, how he's in it for the family, _ha._ Bullshit."

"I know that logically, Sarah. But, a heart feels what it wants to." Marissa reasoned with a shrug

"I know that better than anybody. You think I didn't _want_ to believe in my ex? But my heart could only be stomped on so many times before I had to say enough is enough. I felt like an idiot, and I was embarrassed to look like such an idiot in front of my girls."

"Heh. Probably how I look like an idiot to Freddie...Poor boy. My ex doesn't stand a chance with him. Freddie's already made that abundantly clear."

"Yeah, Sam ain't got no roses for her old man either. Mel is more forgiving, but not Sam."

"They have every right to feel that way...I don't know. It's like I'm being sucked into this fantasy about us getting back together and us being a happy family again. Of course, we _can't_ be a happy family again, but..."

"That's only how I felt every time I took the twins' father back."

"You're such a woman." Marissa teased

"Ha ha ha. We are a complicated bunch ain't we?"

"_Too_ much so."

"Yup...I just hope that my girls don't play the fool for any man. Sam, I'm not so much worried about. She can handle any guy who's stupid enough to make a fool of her. It's Mel I'm worried about."

"Well, if what you say is true and she wants my son, you don't have anything to worry about."

"I hope not, because he's gonna be seeing a lot more of her now that she's coming back."

"Yes...I don't know _what_ I'd do if Freddie were clear across the country like that. I barely want to let him out of my sight." Marissa chuckled

"It's tough. Lord knows I missed the girl...Well, I'm gonna be havin' a feast tonight. You and Freddie can come on by if you like."

Marissa looked at the contents of my buggy and grimaced.

"Um, thank you Sarah, but we don't really eat that kind of food." she said as politely as she could

"Eh, more for us. I better keep moving. I gotta get started on dinner, and you know I have to make extra for Sam the trash can."

"It amazes me how that girl eats so much and never gains any weight."

"Ha! It amazes _you_? It's amazed _me_ ever since she was a baby, ha ha ha."

"Ha ha ha. Take care, Sarah."

"Take it easy Marissa. And don't stress yourself out. It's bad for the baby." I ordered

"Right."


	27. You can't go home again

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: What if writing fanfiction was ruled illegal? That would blow.**

**...**

**#26-"You can't go home again"**

**Jacob's view**

I held my still-bleeding nose as I walked out of the place I used to call home, Bushwell Plaza. I had to smile on the inside at how strong my son had become. He plastered me pretty good.

I deserved it though. Hell, I deserved _worse_. I got lucky that the boy didn't beat me to a bloody pulp. I would have let him if he wanted to. He deserves to do so after what I did to him and Marissa.

Taking one last look at the old apartment building, I made up in my mind that there was no place for me there. Marissa had moved on. Hell, she even had a new man _and_ his baby.

As for me, I guess it's back to Olympia. Back to nothing. The woman I left Marissa and Freddie for left_ me_ for another man last year, in what can only be called karma. But, I deserved it.

I got back in my blue sedan and just sat behind the wheel, thinking. I didn't feel like hitting the road as my nose was still killing me. Eventually I closed my eyes and started to drift off, thinking how royally I screwed up mine and my family's lives, and how much my son hated me for it...

**Marissa's view**

I was finally done with my errands, and I parked my car in the Bushwell parking lot.

I stepped out of my car to retrieve the groceries when I noticed a man with a bloody nose, unconscious, in a blue sedan next to my car!

I ran over and rapped on the window, but I soon recognized the man...

"Jacob!"

Jacob snapped awake and looked me in the eye.

"...Rissa?" he said from inside the car

My ex-husband jumped out of the car and stood face to face with me...

"Jacob."

"Rissa...Hey there."

"Oh my God, what _happened _ to you? Your nose is bloody."

"Heh. Our son happened to me."

"What! Fredward did this to you!"

"It's okay. I had it coming. Hell, I deserved _worse_. I still do.

"My Lord...I told Freddie to...Never mind. Jacob, you shouldn't have come without letting me know first!"

"I know. That's why I was leaving...Freddie...Fredward's made it perfectly clear that I can go to hell."

"But-"

"Congratulations by the way."

"Huh?"

"Your baby. I, uh, had a run in with your new guy."

Oh shit...

"Y-You ran into Spencer?"

"Yeah. He told me in no uncertain terms that if I ever came around again he'd have me taken care of. More incentive to head back to Olympia I suppose, heh."

"Dammit all." I sighed "Jake, what did you think was going to happen? Freddie was gonna leap into your arms and welcome you home? I could have at least stopped him from hitting you."

"I don't know about that Rissa. The boys gotten big, heh." Jake chuckled

"None of this is funny Jake."

"I know it isn't..."

"...You haven't aged well at all." I said out of blue, admiring the man who looked like a middle-aged version of my son

"...What?"

"You heard me. You used to be dashing, but now you're haggered."

"...Well, _you_ don't look so young yourself, Rissa." Jake shot back with a smirk

"I look just fine for my age, thank you!"

"Hey, people who live in glass houses."

"Hmph..."

Jake gently grabbed my chin and directed my gaze to his.

"I never said you weren't still as beautiful as the day I married you."

"...Jake, don't-"

"I'm not. I'm not going to pull anything...I made my choice all those years ago, and I can't go back. I was hoping, but, too much has changed..."

I felt a flood of a thousand tears well up in my eyes. God help me, I wanted to take Jake back so badly, but then there's Spencer...

"Yes, too much has changed." I whispered

"...I'll be on my way...Hey, that guy that you had a baby for, he better take care of you."

"He will. He's a great guy. Oh, and I haven't had his baby yet." I said as I rubbed my tummy

"Oh, so you're pregnant?"

"Yes."

"Well, congratulations all the same...Goodbye Rissa."

"...Jake, if you ever want to talk..."

"I know...Goodbye.

"Goodbye Jake."

Jacob got back in his car, started it up, and speed out of the parking lot. A tear fell from my eye as I watched Jake leave me yet again...

**A/N: A shortie, but I wanted to give you children a little something to snack on. Next chapter will be long as normal.  
**


	28. Tears and prayers

**The show must go on**

**by NihilisticAmbition313**

**Disclaimer: Blank**

**...**

**#27-"Tears and prayers"**

**Marissa's view**

I was afraid. Of what you may ask? Of facing not only Freddie, but Spencer as well. Jake knew that I was pregnant, and Spencer knew he knew I was pregnant.

With my head down, I trudged into the elevator that led up to my floor, not in the least bit looking forward to seeing the two most important males in my life.

**Freddie's view**

"Is it feeling any better?" Melanie asked after making a new ice pack for me

"Not really. Jacob's nose must be made of steel." I replied

I was beginning to worry that I really may have broken my hand. It still hurt long after the blow I laid on Jacob, even in spite of icing it down. I knew that wasn't normal, and I was afraid that I would probably have to go to the hospital.

"You might need to go to the hospital." Sam said, as if reading my mind

"Really? So my mom can find out I tried to bash my father's face in?"

"Dude, your hand is hurt. You gonna put a Brand-Aid on it and call it a day?"

"I'll live."

As I pressed the new ice pack on my hand I heard the door open...

"Freddie."

Mom was home...

**Marissa's view**

My son turned his attention to me. I noticed that he was holding a makeshift ice pack on his hand, obviously the hand he used to hit his father.

"...Mom."

"What happened to your hand?" I asked calmly

I noticed Sam and her sister Melanie become rather uncomfortable.

"...Dad..._Jacob_ came by..."

"And?"

I knew what happened already, but I wanted Freddie to say it for himself.

"...I blasted that motherfucker square in his face." my son hissed with as much anger and venom as one could summon, while at the same time his voice quivered

Without another word, I went to my son and wrapped him in my arms. He hugged me back and began to cry...

**Sam's view**

In all the years I've known Freddie, I've rarely ever seen him cry. In fact, the only time I saw him cry before now was at Carly's funeral. I always considered him a dork, but if there were one thing I could say about the boy, he was a tough dork.

I felt tears of my own welling up, and looking at Melanie, I could tell she was welling up too.

Miss B. just held her son and let him cry on her shoulder. My God, how long have those tears been building up? The tears of the hurt from his father leaving him so coldly. The tears of wondering why. More than likely the tears of feeling like it was his fault. I felt so sorry for Freddie...

"He's gone now, Freddie...Shhh. Don't cry my baby. It's okay." Miss B. said softly as she smoothed Freddie's chocolate hair

"I hate him." Freddie sobbed

"Shhh...Hush now little baby. It's okay. You're okay, we're okay...We made it, Freddie. We made it without him, you and me."

I hated seeing Freddie so distraught. It wasn't the kind of juvenile distraught that I caused him. It was _real_ distraught, and watching him feel it hurt me to my heart.

"You and me, Freddie...We're a team honey, and guess what. We have a new member coming on board."

Freddie heaved a sob onto his mom's shoulder. Melanie turned away and began weeping. I went over to my twin and put my hand on her shoulder.

"He's okay Mel."

"I know...It's just now I'm thinking about Daddy." she whispered

Me and Melanie's father wasn't around, but that wasn't by his own decision. He was killed in a liquor store robbery when Mel and I were nine. The robbers didn't want any witnesses, so they shot him down. According to the robbers, when they were caught, Daddy begged for his life, but they shot him anyway. That was when Momma fell into a downward spiral and turned to alchohol. She started drinking just to make it through the day. I turned to overeating and acting out, and Melanie turned to her studies. Between us, though, Mel has had the hardest time getting over Daddy's death. I've managed to put it in the back of my mind, but Mel can't even bear to hear Daddy's name without breaking down, poor girl.

Soon enough, everybody stopped crying and dried it up (To my relief). I looked and noticed Freddie was still favoring his hand.

"Freddie, I think you should get that checked out, seriously." I said after separating from Mel

"I agree." said Miss B.

"I'm fine."

"Fredward, we're going to the hospital." Miss B. insisted

"Freddie, just go. Please." I pleaded

"...Fine." he growled

"We'll stay behind Miss B., if it's okay." I said

"Oh, yes it's fine Samantha."

"Actually, I'll go." Mel piped up

"Fine, let's just go already." Freddie hissed

"Okay, okay."

Freddie, Miss B., and Melanie all left, leaving me all alone in the Bensons' apartment.

Don't get any ideas. I wasn't about to go snooping around Freddie's place.

I sat down on the sofa and kicked my flip-flops off, kicking my bare feet up on the coffee table (Miss B. would have a hissy fit if she saw that). My mind wandered toward Freddie and what was wrong with his hand. It also wandered to the moment he hurt his hand by walloping his dad square in the schnoz. I'd never seen Freddie hit anyone, let alone so hard that he hurt his damn self. It wasn't a very comfortable sight.

My mind then wandered to Carly, and what she would have thought. She wouldn't have condoned what Freddie did at all, but she would have looked the other way because of what Mr. Benson did to Freddie.

Then my mind wandered to Wendy. I had no idea if the girl was dead or alive, and I was getting scared. I tried to get word, but to no avail. I wanted to try to call somebody who would know her status, but by then I was scared. I was scared somebody would tell me she was...

I hoped to heaven she was alive. I keep replaying the fight we had over and over in my mind, and the potential that that could be my last memory of Wendy frightened me. I was angry at her, but I didn't want her to die. I've seen too much death in my life...

I suddenly felt compelled to do something that I hadn't done since i was six. I put my ham aside, stood up from the sofa, and got down on my knees. I clasped my hands together, bowed my head, and closed my eyes...

"Hey, God...It's me, Sam Puckett...Look, I know I don't keep in touch, and I know I'm not on your good list, but, there's a lotta chizz going on down here. I just want you...I mean, I just ask if you would make everything good. Please let Wendy be okay. If you do I'll make up with her as soon as possible, I promise...And too, help Freddie deal, not just about his father but about the baby...Make sure Miss Benson and Spencer's baby is okay and makes it to this world. I wanna hold my niece, or nephew...Help Melanie find her way. She's at a crossroad and she needs help. And, help keep Momma on the right path. She's doing great, and she's getting better everyday. I'm so proud of her, God; help her stay on the right path... And tell Daddy and Carly to look over us, and that we love them and miss them. Please...Amen."


End file.
